Dear California

I thought you were going to take your ball and go home in a fit of secession fever? You don't want the evil US of A telling you what to do on immigration and stuff. The very notion the rest of us ignorant flyover country rubes ignored your wishes and elected the Trumpster was just too much.

Now you want Trump to send you money and help because you managed to fall asleep while smoking and set the place on fire?  Isn't it strange how those icky red staters are willing to help? A whole bunch of nasty Republicans control the money spigot.

Keep in mind Uncle Sam will not be sending any "sorry about your big fire" baskets of goodies after you secede.