The music's over, turn out the lights

Personal and work events have combined to make this the last post at Fat in Indiana.

These events began some months ago, and came to a head at the beginning of August.

At this point I have to be out of my house by Monday.

Oh, I guess I need to be more clear -- we are moving into a new home (new to us). Packing, moving, all of that good stuff will take up my time. Internet will be off until the cable guys find time in their busy schedule to hook us up again. I will post again after that.

This whole post reminds me of an old college drinking song called "I'm an asshole." You sing it to the tune of Darling Clementine (you know like Huckleberry Hound used to sing):

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole 'till I die
But I'd rather be an asshole
Than a Beta Theta Pi

What can I say, I'm an asshole. At least the post has a title, not a number, Freddie!

Enjoy the holiday weekend and I will be back as soon as possible. The best option is to click several times an hour to see if I am back yet.

Otter, you have the keys to the place if you so desire to hang out and entertain in my absence.

Salute to Unions

Here is a post for Labor Day.

Many years ago I worked at a factory that employed over 600 people. I worked in what the union guys would have called management. After I left, I still had many friends that worked there, both blue and white collar. New owners had purchased the plant. They called in the Union President, and officials from the Union local. The company explained they were losing money. They asked for a relaxation of job classifications and concessions on benefits. At the time the union workers had a $5 copay and paid ZERO towards their health/dental/vision insurance. This was as little as 10 years ago, so it was a sweet deal even then. The company did not ask for wage concessions -- just pay some towards the insurance. A week later the Union President came back and said no to everything. He would not even budge on the job classification issue which would have improved production. The company promised no lay-offs would occur with job changes, but it might over time reduce the total workers by five or six (out of 600). The company promised this reduction would come through attrition. The Union said NO.

The next week the company announced that the plant would close and the production would move to a plant in another state. That factory had been there for more than 30 years. The wages were in the 12-15 dollar range plus benies. The jobs were gone. Never to come back. The average age of union workers in that plant was over 40. Few found jobs that could compete with what they were being paid. The salary employees lost their jobs because a schmuck with no education thought he was a big-time negotiator. He was heard to lament later " I thought they were joking when they told me one of the plants was going to close". He told a friend of mine the reason he wanted to President of the Union was that he got first choice on overtime, and then could not work, claiming he was doing union business. "I get paid OT for drinking coffee and shooting the shit." he crowed.

So this labor day when you think about unions remember the jobs they have cost. Remember the added thousands in the price of your car because of the unions. Ask where the American steel industry has gone. Thank the unions for the destruction of the textile industry.

Unions did much for the working man. They had a vital role in the past. Now I wonder if they do more good or harm?

Indiana, my Indiana

There is nothing I could add that would make this more amusing:

He's a good driver

Wednesday Interlude

I drank a couple cups of java this morning before I left on my trip. About an hour into the drive I had the need to relieve myself so I stopped off at a rest stop. While standing at the urinal I felt the need to pass wind, but stopped myself just in time -- a little old turd was playing whack-a-mole with my sphincter. I went to a stall, wiped the seat and did my business. While I was sitting there listening to the music in my head, I began to tap my toes to that little ditty "I Am Sixteen" from the Sound of Music. I love that song. Next thing I know the guy next to me is tapping his toes with me, only he has stuck the end of his black, tasseled loafer under my side! Then he reaches under the partition and gives me the come hither finger wave. Holy shit what is going on. He then slips me a business card with the US Government seal and tells me if I let him in he will do unspeakable acts to my private parts. I got the heck out of there fast, his last words lingering in my ears -- "Hey, I ain't no queer..."

Hip hip hooray for hypocracy

I thought the press, the Today Show, the Democrat Party, Soros, Kos and the liberals all were firm in their position that one's sexual life was private and had no bearing on political life.

Personally, I think a guy getting his jollies in a public restroom is sick, but far less disgusting than an elected Representative taking bribes and getting caught with the marked bribe money in his freezer. I am pretty firm in my belief that the guy taking bribes is a far, far greater danger to the Republic. The restroom guy should just go away for being stupid.

But that is just me.

Overthrow the Government

The left in this country has become so off-kilter, so deranged, so much the rabid dog I fear for the future of our nation. Never in the darkest days of the Clinton Criminal co-Presidency did any sane person advocate a traitorous act of sedition. Martin Lewis advocated no less in the Huffington Post Saturday. This crazed left-winger has asked General Pace to actually arrest the President for conduct unbecoming an officer. First, the President is a civilian. While he is the Commander-in-Chief of the armed forces, he is not a commissioned officer. In the second case being a bad CIC, or making poor decisions regarding the use of the military has become a tradition for a few decades now. Could the mis-management (or micromanagement) of the war in Vietnam be a better example? Every life lost by an American is precious, but this administration has about 47,000 lives to go before it reaches the gross incompetency of that of LBJ and company. Do we need to discuss the horrific decisions made by the previous administration in Somalia or the Balkans? If we are going to allow the military to decide what is sound policy, we become no more than a banana republic. When the Praetorian Guard began to decide who would be Caesar, the end was in sight for the Roman Empire.

The military decisions in this country are taken in this nation by civilians, not the military command. There is good reason for this. Go read or rent Flight of the Intruder to get a view of this. In the movie Fred Thompson of all people explains the whys to young Jake Grafton in one of the most moving parts of the movie. We all understand why Grafton did what he did. We also all know it was wrong.

The hysterical rantings of Mr. Martin are a sign the left has finally lost control. If a right leaning reporter had suggested a similar act under the Clinton Presidency he would have been jailed for sedition, the NY Times and ABCNBCCBSCNN sounding the charge. The airwaves would be choked with invective against right wingers. Matt Lauer would look at the camera grave faced and ask where we are as a nation. This article stirs not a feather in the mainstream media. That tells you where the left and the Democrat Party has gone. They court the crazies at HUFFPO, KOS and their ilk because they believe what they say. Go read the article and convince me I am wrong.

If you would vote for these people you are a nut job. You are trying to destroy the basic freedoms of this nation. Treason is not free speech, sedition is not a right. The only positive is the fact that most right-leaning citizens also support the Second Amendment. We will protect our nation. We have the guns.

edit. Read through the comments on the article, now Lewis claims it was all satire and irony. Funny he was defending the position to the end on Saturday. Perhaps he read the Constitution? Perhaps he spoke with a lawyer? BTW, in all seriousness, could someone explain to me the laws Bush has broken? On what grounds should he be impeached/arrested/removed from office? Did he lie in open court? Did he sell US Military secrets to the Chinese? Did he rape someone? Did he sexually harrass an intern? What has he done that so inflames the moonbats?

Hoosier Beachfront

Here you have real pictures of the Indiana Dunes. See the Chicago skyline in the in the distance in picture #2. It may not be the Jersey Shore (there is not New Yawk pollution washing ashore), but it beats the hell out of Sheepshead Bay (That name really makes you want to go wading).




clickee makee bigee

Leonidas likes it Greek Style

I crack myself up, really I do. You have to read that "really I do" with that east coast Vassar accent the ladies all used in old-time 1920/30's movies. You know that snooty accent? Could you stand bedding a chick with an accent like that? "Oh Charles, You make me all tingly. We simply must get Carmen to clean this mess. Tennis anyone?" No, you are right. I am not sure where that was going. Maybe it is time to get back on the meds.

Jeepers the Lions are pathetic. Manning put up stats in the first half that many quarterbacks would wet their pants if they could do it in a whole game. Man, that is a poorly written sentence.

Do not tell anyone -- I am drinking coffee at the computer. A HUGE no-no at the HB homestead.

I have some good stuff going on today. I do not think I will discuss it with you. Not even if you send me hot naked pictures.

Sorry, but the picture of the "Restored Indian Village near Lafayette" -- that cracks me up. Now you know what kind of humor gets me going.

Go forth, good readers and enjoy yourself this Sunday. Report back here and let me know what you did, especially if you got laid, or fantasized about doing the nasty with a certain Spartan King (YOU know who you are!)

More Hoosierboy Travelogue

An example of why New Jersey is known as the "Garden State"
This is THE tree that once grew in Brooklyn. A book was written about it.

More Indiana Landmarks

Versailles (Ripley County),IN
Restored Indian Village near Tippecanoe Battlefield -- Lafayette, IN
Fort Wayne
Chapel at a well-known University in South Bend
Fire tower in the Hoosier National Forest
Office park on the north side of Indianapolis
Founder of Evansville,IN

Further proof

New Jersey:

Brooklyn:


Indiana:

Live blogging, and NSFW

Periodically we bloggers ponder why we do this goofy hobby. For me it is a place to spew the unfiltered thoughts that rattle in my skull like pebbles in a coffee can. Here is one of my favorite post subjects -- live blogging my thoughts:

I cannot believe someone from Brooklyn, New Yawk Freakin' City makes fun of someone from New Frickin' Jersey. Here is a Jersey Beach:Here is a Brooklyn Beach: Now compare that to the beach front in Indiana:I would venture neither has much to be proud of. Like the song says "Jed move away from there, Indiana is the place you outta be..." Here is a further example of the scenery you could find in the Hoosier State:Or this:"I believe you have proven your case Mr. Mason..."

It is hot. We have missed almost all of the rain that is socking the Midwest

Can we just forget the farce that is preseason NFL?

Man I really, really hope I did not get Freddie in trouble joking around in her comments. That is why I rarely comment.

I just shat a turd that looks like a crawdad.

I have to pay the electricity bill today

Here is a picture of the Michelin Man's Mom:
I heard from an old friend this week, It was way cool.

The oldest boy seems to be doing fine at college. He says he has made some new friends. He gets pissed when we ask him what he calls stupid questions like "are you eating?" or "are you sleeping OK?" Someday he will be a parent.

It is ridiculous in today's age, coupled with the cost of a University education that dorm rooms are not air conditioned. These same universities scream about how our world is warming, yet they do nothing to protect their students from the heat?

Friday. Friday. Friday. And yesterday was payday!!!

I have again achieved perfection, a whole post with nothing of substance. I am developing a true art form here. I know, I know, you wish you could be more like me...

One sweet ride

This is the car described by Eric in in the comments to my post below. Man, at one time Detroit had a great sense of style.

Truck is on fire...

Erin, who is a real writer and has serious talent (she makes me jealous) writes about your car and what it says about you. The first vehicle I ever owned was a 1966 Chevy C10. It looked like the one there in the picture only it was black and the stripe down the side was red. The roof was white though. I paid $400 for it. It was a total piece of crap. The floorboards were completely rusted away, you could see the middle stripe in the road from the driver's side and the right hand stripe from the passenger side. Through the floor. I taped rugs over the holes in the winter to help keep out the cold. The gas tank was in the cab, behind the bench seat. It was partially rusted so that if you had more than a half tank of gas you were nearly overcome by fumes. The bed was plywood over rusted beams. The truck was a three speed on the column.

I bought it from a mechanic. The bumper and front end was dented in from pushing cars and buses. The headlights pointed in different directions, never at the road. It ran like thoroughbred. It would speed down the highway at 70 or 80 mph without a hitch. I do not know how fast it would really go because the body would shake and vibrate so bad at 80 you would have to hang on to the wheel for support. The passenger door had neither a window crank nor door handle. I had vice grips in the glove box if you wanted to roll down the window. I usually just threw my empty beer cans on the passenger floor.

Once my dad and I were going to Otter's to help him move some furniture. We placed a cooler in the seat between us and started off in the light rain. I had filled the tank full for the drive, so gas fumes were strong. I stopped at an intersection and noticed smoke coming up through the floor behind me. I shouted that we were on fire and bailed out of the cab. I forgot there was no door handle on my dad's side. The seat was blocked by a large cooler. He began to shout for me to let him out. I started laughing as I realized the situation. Water in the bed had sloshed when I stopped, hitting the hot exhaust, sending steam through the rust hole in the floor.

Climbing back into the drivers seat as I explained it all to my dad. He did not find it amusing. Ashen-faced he cracked open a beer as we accelerated onto the highway. He called me an SOB and a few other select names. He was shaking as he asked if I thought it was safe to light a cigarette. I laughingly told him to go ahead, we would know in an instant if the fumes were too strong. When you are young you really do not give a shit about stuff like that -- you think you are immortal.

I had a lot of adventures in that truck, including the time I drove over a cow. I will tell you about that sometime. The truck finally blew the engine a gloomy fall day as I drove to work. I sold it for $50. I would like to say I watched it go teary-eyed, but that would be a lie.

What was your first car?

The government outta...

I threw a couple of Brats on the grill and opened a can of kraut to heat for lunch.

I guess the grill was too hot because I split the skins on the brats. That pissed me off. If I was a libtard Dimocrit I would blame YOU. I was reading blogs when the splittage occurred. Since I take responsibility, it was my fault. What the heck, the sausages and kraut still tasted great.

A Night with Hoosierboy

I am rereading the Da Vinci Code. I really do not buy the premise, there are too many holes in the history. The book is a good read anyway. I decided to hop on the internet and look at an image of one of the paintings Brown was discussing. I found myself drawn to various websites debunking the book. Then, as usual, I was distracted into side research. This was always a problem in my budding historian days. I was always sidetracked by interesting side stories.

Quick interlude: I do have to say that the internet has simplified research so much. Kids today do not know the joy and anguish of going to the library and researching the subject through dry and dusty tomes. While one needs a jaundiced eye while researching on the web (you needed one with books too), it is a great starting point.

I click and read as Leno faded to Conan. I jumped back to the novel. I jumped back to the computer and stopped myself. I turned off the lights. I turned off my son's TV and watched him sleep for a few moments. I crept to the bed and snuggled down into the soft mattress. I pulled the pillow under my left arm, sleeping on my stomach. I put my face under the pillow and sprawled my left leg against my wife's butt. She was inher usual sleeping position, curled like a fetus, her back to me. Her warmth on my leg was a nice contrast to the cool sheets. I uttered a quick prayer of thanks as I drifted off to sleep.

Cell Phone Self Portrait

Here is a picture I took of myself while sitting bored at the mall a few weeks ago while we were doing back-to-school shopping.

It is funny, we all have an image of ourselves. We view in our idols and heroes traits we have or would like to have. Many manly men identify with John Wayne or Clint Eastwood. When I was younger I idolized Errol Flynn. His dashing good looks coupled with a daring audacity appealed to me. As I read his autobiography I came to know he lived the adventurous life he played in the movies.

I am not Errol Flynn by any means. I am short and overweight. I do not carouse, womanize and party like the legendary swashbuckler. "In like Flynn" was just not a term, it described his legendary prowess with the ladies. I can only laugh when I compare my own life.

These days I am not sure whom I idolize. I wish I was more like my own Dad. He has worked hard, enjoys life, and was an exceptional father. I guess it is sad that at some point I gave up the fantasies of sailing the high seas rescuing maidens or walking the proud side of the law with the Duke. I am not Dirty Harry or Big Jake or Don Juan or Robin Hood. I am just a guy trying to make a living, raise his kids and find some humor in life. I can live with that. After all I really would not look good sporting a pencil-thin mustache.

Rambling Man

Bend you arms at the elbows 90 degrees so your hands are in front of you. Put your elbows close to your body. You should now look like you are ready to catch a large beach ball.

Is there anything natural about this position? Have you ever assumed this stance during a conversation? Me neither. Why do car salesmen on TV assume this posture during commercials? It annoys the crap out of me. Watch and see if at least eleventy-five percent of the talking heads on car ads adopt this position. Someone somewhere must have done a study that says this makes one look sincere or honest or something, because they all do it these days.

I said previously, is there anything more dreadful than preseason football? If you watched the Colts subs vs. the Bears subs last night you saw the Colts starters beat the Bears starters. Man, if I was a fan of da Bears I would be worried as heck about giving the reigns of my team to Rex Grossman.

Is anyone else sick of Vick? T.O. must be livid that someone else is getting all of the NFL publicity these days. I am sure he is plotting some outrage to recapture the headlines. If I were Michael Vick I would be pissed. He takes his old neighborhood homies, lets them leach off his fame and fortune. He sets them up in business, they are his boys, his posse. At the first sign of adversity they turn and rat him out. That my friends is a definition of scum sucking fair weather friends. On a completely different note, Peyton Manning is on the radio right now, he is funny as hell. He comes across as a very personable guy.

I hate to repeat myself. Seriously, I hate to repeat myself, but #@#$%$#& Cubs. I titled this post 'rambling man' because that is what this post is about -- rambling thoughts.

A Day in the Life

Last week the daughter dropped a jar of salsa that smashed on the floor smothering the walls, the floor, the door to the garage, and her Nike Shox with red gooey mess. We cleaned up, swept the floor, mopped and swept the floor again. I threw her shoes in the washer and amazingly the came clean.

The next morning, despite our extraordinary efforts, I stepped on a sliver of glass. The tiny puncture wound seeped blood for a couple of days and despite my best efforts the glass remains in the ball of my foot. The wound is healed over, but I feel a slight pain in my foot when I walk. There you have it -- an example of the drama that is my life.

ch-ch-ch-changes

I finally broke down and entered the mysterious and evil template to make some changes and add some links. The best way to see what is new is to click each and every link over there on the right. You will not be disappointed.

If you want a link or want to be removed why don't you drop me an email or a comment and I will do it while I am in the mood.