October 31, 2007
It is all in a name
There are just certain names you can no longer use for your kid. Adolph, Napoleon, Vlad, Dracula and Hillary all come to mind. Thanks to The Kinks, anyone who names their daughter Lola is a sadistic mental midget.
October 29, 2007
Ode to Fred
I was desperate, working two part time jobs at just above minimum wage. My wife was pregnant with our first child. My college degree was not opening the doors of opportunity. Times were tough, I lost out one job because the other final candidate had nearly twenty years of experience. The early/mid eighties were hard times, economically. I saw the ad in the paper and zipped off a resume.
I am not sure why I was called for an interview. I was not qualified in any way to be a Quality Manager at an injection molding plant. It was clear to me ten minutes into the interview I was not qualified. For the plant manager, Fred, I am sure it was clear within two minutes. He spent considerable time talking to me anyway. Maybe he was looking for a respite from plant issues. As the discussions wrapped up he gently told me 'Thanks, but no thanks...lack of experience...blah, blah...' Dang, darn and double damn, I just had to get a real job. My wife was supporting us, thankfully she had good insurance.
I had nothing to lose at this point, and this guy had been very nice to me. I asked the question we have all wanted to ask. I said " Fred, I understand I am not qualified for this job. I agree I do not have the experience. I hear that all the time. Just how am I to get experience if no one will hire me?" Fred commiserated a bit, told me he got his start in the military and said I should keep trying, the right job would come around. I went home and circled more ads in the paper.
A few days later I got a call. It was Fred. He had a proposition for me. He had gone to corporate and got permission to create a position for me -- Management Trainee. He promised I would get experience. He said I would do a variety of work, running presses, driving a forklift, filing, scheduling, everything. He promised I would work hard, I might have to do shift work, and the pay would be low -- about the same hourly wage I was making at my part-time jobs. Taking that job remains today one of the best decisions I have ever made.
I did it all: every job in the plant except heavy maintenance and the plant manager's job. I ran presses, swept floors, did assembly, supervised every shift. I did payroll and served as the receptionist. Scheduling, inventory, driving a forklift were all in a day's work. There was no regular rotation. If someone was sick or needed a hand -- I was the man. I might run a press for a few hours. I would get called to the office and home I would go -- ready to be foreman for the second or third shift. I worked like a dog. Often I put in eighty hours a week. I would work twelve hours on Friday and come back to supervise the twelve hour weekend shifts we had hired. I would work from 3 am to 3 pm on Friday, return to work 12 am to 12 pm on Saturday and Sunday. Back to regular work at 7 am on Monday. Week after week. I learned about manufacturing. I watched Fred and learned how to manage people.
I cleaned the gutters at his house, washed his car and went to buy him concert tickets. I picked up his wife when her car broke down. I drove his daughter home from school when she missed the bus, all part of the training. And when Fred was promoted to the corporate office I drove his car to New York so it would not have to be shipped.
I was a valuable fill-in for the company. Given time, I might have had a bright future. Three years of working my ass off,and I now had experience. A recruiter called and I was offered a new job. The Company was not pleased, the President called to try and talk me into staying. The wage differential was just too much. Fred called and offered congratulations.
I have only seen him a few times since. He eventually moved back to Indiana. His slight drinking problem became a major drinking problem. He did some time in politics, a few stints as a plant manager. The last I heard he was running the street department in my home town.
Last week I got an email from a friend. She said that rumor has it Fred tried to kill himself. He was in the hospital. There was some shady dealings at the Street Department and Fred was implicated. The shame was too much.
Fred was one of the best three managers I have ever had. he taught me about manufacturing, about management and about people. Most of all he gave a wet behind the ears twenty-four year old kid a chance. Thank you, Fred. May God give you the strength to exercise your demons. You had a profound positive influence on my life.
I am not sure why I was called for an interview. I was not qualified in any way to be a Quality Manager at an injection molding plant. It was clear to me ten minutes into the interview I was not qualified. For the plant manager, Fred, I am sure it was clear within two minutes. He spent considerable time talking to me anyway. Maybe he was looking for a respite from plant issues. As the discussions wrapped up he gently told me 'Thanks, but no thanks...lack of experience...blah, blah...' Dang, darn and double damn, I just had to get a real job. My wife was supporting us, thankfully she had good insurance.
I had nothing to lose at this point, and this guy had been very nice to me. I asked the question we have all wanted to ask. I said " Fred, I understand I am not qualified for this job. I agree I do not have the experience. I hear that all the time. Just how am I to get experience if no one will hire me?" Fred commiserated a bit, told me he got his start in the military and said I should keep trying, the right job would come around. I went home and circled more ads in the paper.
A few days later I got a call. It was Fred. He had a proposition for me. He had gone to corporate and got permission to create a position for me -- Management Trainee. He promised I would get experience. He said I would do a variety of work, running presses, driving a forklift, filing, scheduling, everything. He promised I would work hard, I might have to do shift work, and the pay would be low -- about the same hourly wage I was making at my part-time jobs. Taking that job remains today one of the best decisions I have ever made.
I did it all: every job in the plant except heavy maintenance and the plant manager's job. I ran presses, swept floors, did assembly, supervised every shift. I did payroll and served as the receptionist. Scheduling, inventory, driving a forklift were all in a day's work. There was no regular rotation. If someone was sick or needed a hand -- I was the man. I might run a press for a few hours. I would get called to the office and home I would go -- ready to be foreman for the second or third shift. I worked like a dog. Often I put in eighty hours a week. I would work twelve hours on Friday and come back to supervise the twelve hour weekend shifts we had hired. I would work from 3 am to 3 pm on Friday, return to work 12 am to 12 pm on Saturday and Sunday. Back to regular work at 7 am on Monday. Week after week. I learned about manufacturing. I watched Fred and learned how to manage people.
I cleaned the gutters at his house, washed his car and went to buy him concert tickets. I picked up his wife when her car broke down. I drove his daughter home from school when she missed the bus, all part of the training. And when Fred was promoted to the corporate office I drove his car to New York so it would not have to be shipped.
I was a valuable fill-in for the company. Given time, I might have had a bright future. Three years of working my ass off,and I now had experience. A recruiter called and I was offered a new job. The Company was not pleased, the President called to try and talk me into staying. The wage differential was just too much. Fred called and offered congratulations.
I have only seen him a few times since. He eventually moved back to Indiana. His slight drinking problem became a major drinking problem. He did some time in politics, a few stints as a plant manager. The last I heard he was running the street department in my home town.
Last week I got an email from a friend. She said that rumor has it Fred tried to kill himself. He was in the hospital. There was some shady dealings at the Street Department and Fred was implicated. The shame was too much.
Fred was one of the best three managers I have ever had. he taught me about manufacturing, about management and about people. Most of all he gave a wet behind the ears twenty-four year old kid a chance. Thank you, Fred. May God give you the strength to exercise your demons. You had a profound positive influence on my life.
October 27, 2007
Why you should never watch Rosie
Oh, probably not safe for work or anyone under 18. If this applies to you do not look today.
October 26, 2007
Random thoughts
I would like some pie. Who wants to make the old HB a pie? I prefer fruit pies.
That is all I have at the moment.
That is all I have at the moment.
October 25, 2007
What he said...
The man is a damn genius
James at Old and Evil always skins it down to simplicity and common sense. Must be the Hoosier upbringing or the career in the military. If you are not reading him every day, you should.
I guess JK Rowlings revealed that one of her creations might be gay. Get a fucking life people its just a damn book, the same book that has flying broom sticks , dragons and a ton of magic. Its called “FICTION” for christ sake, imagination, it ain’t real, but I guess some people are still in shock that there really isn’t a starship Enterprise.
James at Old and Evil always skins it down to simplicity and common sense. Must be the Hoosier upbringing or the career in the military. If you are not reading him every day, you should.
Enough about the cheating Patriots already...
Blah, blah, blah The Patriots are the greatest team ever...score soooo many points...blah, blah. They said that about the Rams a few years ago too. They lost in the Super bowl to a balanced team with a good defense. The Colts can score on anyone. The game on November 4 will come down to who has the better defense, who can get a key turnover.
The Patriots wil not go undefeated, even if they beat the Colts. Even an egomaniac like Belicheater will rest his starters after Home field and the playoffs are a lock. Do you really think he will plays his starters against winless Miami in a meaningless game in December?
Honestly, who would you choose for your team -- harrison, Wayne and Clark or that pothead Moss. Like TO, his poison will come out and infect the whole team.
The Patriots wil not go undefeated, even if they beat the Colts. Even an egomaniac like Belicheater will rest his starters after Home field and the playoffs are a lock. Do you really think he will plays his starters against winless Miami in a meaningless game in December?
Honestly, who would you choose for your team -- harrison, Wayne and Clark or that pothead Moss. Like TO, his poison will come out and infect the whole team.
October 24, 2007
What I saw in the edge of the Limberlost
One of the neat things about being a travelling salesman is that my car breaks down often near a farmhouse. The farmer always has a bevy of hot horny daughters...Well I do get to see some interesting stuff like this:
That is Gene Stratton Porter's house. I took the picture with my phone yesterday. Some of you older readers may have been forced to read the Limberlost books.
I have not read MS Porter's books, but I am told they are pretty good. For me, you just cannot beat another Hoosier author for a novel of early Indiana life. I highly recommend you head to the library and get the Bears of Blue River. What the heck, check out some Gene Stratton Porter too.
That is Gene Stratton Porter's house. I took the picture with my phone yesterday. Some of you older readers may have been forced to read the Limberlost books.
I have not read MS Porter's books, but I am told they are pretty good. For me, you just cannot beat another Hoosier author for a novel of early Indiana life. I highly recommend you head to the library and get the Bears of Blue River. What the heck, check out some Gene Stratton Porter too.
You should read Ralphd00d
I always miss out on the fun. My man and ex-pat Hoosier hit the big 10K mark yesterday. I was on the road and missed out. Here is a gratuitous link anyway Ralph. Congrats.
October 23, 2007
Nothing
Long day at a customer location. I really have nothing to offer except my opinion that Tony Kornheiser is a complete dooshbag. Did he not recognize that New England was NOT playing the MNF game last night? I swear he sleeps with a blow-up Tom Brady Doll. I think he would blow Brady if he walked into the broadcast booth.
My wife was reading a magazine while the game was on, and even she commented about the love affair. She asked why I did not turn down the sound. I would have, but the Colts gave the broadcast rights to an AM station that pumps out about 50 watts after dark. I am stuck watching the assholes on ESPN.
I never thought I would miss Howard Cossel and Dandy Don. Even a stuttering bumbling Madden or a caustic Dennis Miller is better than Jaws and Korheiser screaming at each other. Oh, and nice job almost missing the safety because we are too busy talking to Russell Crowe about rugby.
My wife was reading a magazine while the game was on, and even she commented about the love affair. She asked why I did not turn down the sound. I would have, but the Colts gave the broadcast rights to an AM station that pumps out about 50 watts after dark. I am stuck watching the assholes on ESPN.
I never thought I would miss Howard Cossel and Dandy Don. Even a stuttering bumbling Madden or a caustic Dennis Miller is better than Jaws and Korheiser screaming at each other. Oh, and nice job almost missing the safety because we are too busy talking to Russell Crowe about rugby.
October 22, 2007
Ode to Texas
Texas has brought us many wonderful things. Here is a list:
Texas themed steak house chains
The legend of the Alamo
Some of my favorite bloggers. I bet I have more Texicans on my blogroll than any other state.
This guy. Please, take ten minutes and peruse his site, you will thank me later.
One of the best fourth quarters of football ever, in the Texans/Titans game yesterday. What a heartbreaker for all 37 Houston fans.
Texas themed steak house chains
The legend of the Alamo
Some of my favorite bloggers. I bet I have more Texicans on my blogroll than any other state.
This guy. Please, take ten minutes and peruse his site, you will thank me later.
One of the best fourth quarters of football ever, in the Texans/Titans game yesterday. What a heartbreaker for all 37 Houston fans.
October 21, 2007
Up in Smoke
I enjoy a good cigar periodically. I have a small humidor and it usually has 15 to twenty cigars nestled in cedar/tobacco scented humidity. Lately, there is a variety of bands and sizes represented. I have moved away from buying stogies by the box to purchases of cigars that I like or catch my fancy. Nearly all are 'good' cigars, none are the kind you would find at the drug store or gas station, if you understand.
I have maduros and naturals, Most are of medium ring size and length. One aspect is a constant. My best, most expensive cigars will be waiting, meticulously cared for. I will purchase a good cigar, paying ten, fifteen or more hard-earned greenbacks. Then I will not smoke it. The Ashton Cabinet selection I acquired for my daughter's graduation -- unsmoked. Maybe I will try to light it at her college graduation next year. This same tale could be told for a half a dozen perfectos in the humidor.
The 20 cigar box of H. Uppmans gifted me by my wife for Christmas took years to burn up in fragrant smoke. I gave away probably 6-8 at that. The last of the litter I smoked last winter -- probably 12 years after being out in the humidor.
My very good cigars --I know they are there. I take them out on occasion and smell their magnificent aroma, inhaling the scent of fine tobacco and the perfumes of cedar. I gently put them in their place and grab a less expensive smoke to enjoy on the deck. Should they age that long? Am I missing on the full bodied flavour by admiring the construction instead of smoking the little turds? Maybe. I just cannot help myself. I buy 'em and I keep 'em. Just another quirk of the old HB.
Aren't you proud? A whole post about cigars and never a crack about Clinton/Lewinski. Until the end anyway.
I have maduros and naturals, Most are of medium ring size and length. One aspect is a constant. My best, most expensive cigars will be waiting, meticulously cared for. I will purchase a good cigar, paying ten, fifteen or more hard-earned greenbacks. Then I will not smoke it. The Ashton Cabinet selection I acquired for my daughter's graduation -- unsmoked. Maybe I will try to light it at her college graduation next year. This same tale could be told for a half a dozen perfectos in the humidor.
The 20 cigar box of H. Uppmans gifted me by my wife for Christmas took years to burn up in fragrant smoke. I gave away probably 6-8 at that. The last of the litter I smoked last winter -- probably 12 years after being out in the humidor.
My very good cigars --I know they are there. I take them out on occasion and smell their magnificent aroma, inhaling the scent of fine tobacco and the perfumes of cedar. I gently put them in their place and grab a less expensive smoke to enjoy on the deck. Should they age that long? Am I missing on the full bodied flavour by admiring the construction instead of smoking the little turds? Maybe. I just cannot help myself. I buy 'em and I keep 'em. Just another quirk of the old HB.
Aren't you proud? A whole post about cigars and never a crack about Clinton/Lewinski. Until the end anyway.
October 20, 2007
October 18, 2007
Waiting on the other shoe
The wife is gonna be pissed.
I am not too happy myself.
We will be fine, we treat it as extra income.
The third quarter bonus is what we use for Christmas etc.
There will not be a third quarter bonus this year.
Tell me again the economy is rosy.
I am not too happy myself.
We will be fine, we treat it as extra income.
The third quarter bonus is what we use for Christmas etc.
There will not be a third quarter bonus this year.
Tell me again the economy is rosy.
October 17, 2007
What's for lunch?
Tuna salad on Wonder bread with pretzels and a big old glass of apple cider.
What did you have?
What did you have?
Wednesday Whines
Here is what is coursing through my mind on a Wednesday morning:
Mrs Goldbloom,I know you are busy. I know it is quite possible life has tossed you curve balls, there may be problems we do not know. You may be bored with whole blogging thing. Take five minutes and tell us you will not be posting any more. Look at Alli's site for a template.
Alli, please come back. At least leave me a comment that you are alive and well.
A thick, juicy steak sure sounds good.
I have slipped into a mode of too much snacking lately. I have lost about 20 lbs. and I think it is coming back. Willpower HB, willpower.
I need to start getting a little exercises. I have dropped my lunchtime walk habit. I will try to rectify that beginning today.
Here is what I think -- the economy is going to take a HUGE downturn in the next months, probably just prior to the elections. I am seeing a significant slowdown in my customer base, and the forecasts for next year are far from rosy. The stock market and unemployment are not yet reflecting this, but trust me, it is coming. Yesterday I heard a couple of people talking at the gas station and the lady said she just got laid off. That is a phrase we have not heard for a while. The big question is who will get blamed -- Bush or the Dems in Congress if things go bad.
Baseball needs to start shortening the days in the first rounds of the playoffs. The prospect of the World Series in Cleveland or Colorado or Boston played in a driving snowstorm is very real this time of year.
Football finally ended for the little one last night. The team lost again. One win in two years. The coaches finally used more than three plays from the playbook. That is all they used in the previous three games. The game previous they ran EVERY play to the right for the entire game. Then they punished the boys for losing by making them run. In last night's finale, the coaches changed nearly every position and only played 14 kids total in the whole game -- offense, defense and special teams. They seemed really confused when the team ran out of gas in the fourth quarter. The head coach was livid that most of the team took off their helmets and sat down on the bench in the last half of the game. In my years in organized sports I have never seen a worse bunch of coaches.
Seriously, how can anyone consider electing Hillary. I beg anyone to tell me why they would cast a vote for her. I am truly baffled by her popularity.
Mrs Goldbloom,I know you are busy. I know it is quite possible life has tossed you curve balls, there may be problems we do not know. You may be bored with whole blogging thing. Take five minutes and tell us you will not be posting any more. Look at Alli's site for a template.
Alli, please come back. At least leave me a comment that you are alive and well.
A thick, juicy steak sure sounds good.
I have slipped into a mode of too much snacking lately. I have lost about 20 lbs. and I think it is coming back. Willpower HB, willpower.
I need to start getting a little exercises. I have dropped my lunchtime walk habit. I will try to rectify that beginning today.
Here is what I think -- the economy is going to take a HUGE downturn in the next months, probably just prior to the elections. I am seeing a significant slowdown in my customer base, and the forecasts for next year are far from rosy. The stock market and unemployment are not yet reflecting this, but trust me, it is coming. Yesterday I heard a couple of people talking at the gas station and the lady said she just got laid off. That is a phrase we have not heard for a while. The big question is who will get blamed -- Bush or the Dems in Congress if things go bad.
Baseball needs to start shortening the days in the first rounds of the playoffs. The prospect of the World Series in Cleveland or Colorado or Boston played in a driving snowstorm is very real this time of year.
Football finally ended for the little one last night. The team lost again. One win in two years. The coaches finally used more than three plays from the playbook. That is all they used in the previous three games. The game previous they ran EVERY play to the right for the entire game. Then they punished the boys for losing by making them run. In last night's finale, the coaches changed nearly every position and only played 14 kids total in the whole game -- offense, defense and special teams. They seemed really confused when the team ran out of gas in the fourth quarter. The head coach was livid that most of the team took off their helmets and sat down on the bench in the last half of the game. In my years in organized sports I have never seen a worse bunch of coaches.
Seriously, how can anyone consider electing Hillary. I beg anyone to tell me why they would cast a vote for her. I am truly baffled by her popularity.
October 16, 2007
Damn you, Turks
Congress is intent on passing a resolution to condemn the Turks for the slaughter of Armenians back in 1915. As you can imagine, this is pissing of the Turks, one of our few allies in the Middle East. The Democrats who are obsessed with passing this resolution say it has nothing to do with making the long-term prosecution of the war in Iraq more difficult. After all, that Turkey is one of our major points of supply to our troops in Iraq is mere coincidence. I am sure Ms Pelosi will soon be introducing bills to condemn other acts of atrocity. Here is a starter list:
The Russians for the deaths of hundreds of Poles in the Katyn Forest
The Mexicans for the Alamo
The Japanese for Nanking, and Korea and Pearl Harbor
Che and his buddy Castro for his creative use of baseball fields
Pol Pot for the Killing Fields of Cambodia
Stalin for well, being Stalin
Ditto for Lenin (Funny how the Communist populate this list isn't it?)
The Seventh Cavalry for Wounded Knee
The Sioux and Cheyenne Indian Nations for the battle of Little Big Horn (fair is fair)
The Germans for massacre of three Roman Legions at Teutoberger Forest
The Germans for the killing of millions of Jews
Count Dracula for the slaughter of Muslims and Gypsies
Spain for the Incas, Aztecs and others
The US, Colorado Militia, and others for the Sand Creek Massacre
The Mexicans for Camerone
Scipio for the destruction of Carthage
The Greeks for the destruction of Troy and the slaughter of Persians at Marathon
The Persians for the slaughter of Greeks at Thermopylae
And most of all the Congress should condemn that British guy for burning those people alive in the church in the movie The Patriot. That act will make as much sense as going after the Turks for an event nearly one hundred years ago. The slaughter of the Armenians is pretty small potatoes compared to the record of killing and murder by the Communists and Socialists whose philosophy is so admired by Speaker Pelosi.
The Russians for the deaths of hundreds of Poles in the Katyn Forest
The Mexicans for the Alamo
The Japanese for Nanking, and Korea and Pearl Harbor
Che and his buddy Castro for his creative use of baseball fields
Pol Pot for the Killing Fields of Cambodia
Stalin for well, being Stalin
Ditto for Lenin (Funny how the Communist populate this list isn't it?)
The Seventh Cavalry for Wounded Knee
The Sioux and Cheyenne Indian Nations for the battle of Little Big Horn (fair is fair)
The Germans for massacre of three Roman Legions at Teutoberger Forest
The Germans for the killing of millions of Jews
Count Dracula for the slaughter of Muslims and Gypsies
Spain for the Incas, Aztecs and others
The US, Colorado Militia, and others for the Sand Creek Massacre
The Mexicans for Camerone
Scipio for the destruction of Carthage
The Greeks for the destruction of Troy and the slaughter of Persians at Marathon
The Persians for the slaughter of Greeks at Thermopylae
And most of all the Congress should condemn that British guy for burning those people alive in the church in the movie The Patriot. That act will make as much sense as going after the Turks for an event nearly one hundred years ago. The slaughter of the Armenians is pretty small potatoes compared to the record of killing and murder by the Communists and Socialists whose philosophy is so admired by Speaker Pelosi.
October 15, 2007
The Halloween Party
A couple were invited to a swanky family masked fancy dress Halloween
party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to
the
party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued
and
said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no
need for his good time to be spoiled by not going.
So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping
soundly
for about an hour, woke without pain and as it was still early,
decided go
to the party. As her husband didn't know what her costume was, she
thought
she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted
when
she was not with him.
So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband in his costume,
cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice "chick"
he
could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.
His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he
left
his new partner high and dry and devoted his time to her.
She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her
husband.
After more drinks he finally he whispered a little proposition in her
ear
and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had passionate
intercourse in the back seat. Just before unmasking at midnight, she
slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed,
wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous
behavior.
She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of
time
he had.
"Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're
not
there." Then she asked,"Did you dance much?" He replied, "I'll tell
you, I
never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown
and
some other guys, so we went into the spare room and played poker all
evening."
You must have looked really silly wearing that costume playing poker
all
night!" she said with unashamed sarcasm.
To which the husband replied, "Actually, I gave my costume to your
Dad,
apparently he had the time of his life."
party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to
the
party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued
and
said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no
need for his good time to be spoiled by not going.
So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping
soundly
for about an hour, woke without pain and as it was still early,
decided go
to the party. As her husband didn't know what her costume was, she
thought
she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted
when
she was not with him.
So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband in his costume,
cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice "chick"
he
could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.
His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he
left
his new partner high and dry and devoted his time to her.
She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her
husband.
After more drinks he finally he whispered a little proposition in her
ear
and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had passionate
intercourse in the back seat. Just before unmasking at midnight, she
slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed,
wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous
behavior.
She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of
time
he had.
"Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're
not
there." Then she asked,"Did you dance much?" He replied, "I'll tell
you, I
never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown
and
some other guys, so we went into the spare room and played poker all
evening."
You must have looked really silly wearing that costume playing poker
all
night!" she said with unashamed sarcasm.
To which the husband replied, "Actually, I gave my costume to your
Dad,
apparently he had the time of his life."
October 14, 2007
The paranoid's lament
I think my wife is trying to kill me. I am positive she is slipping various prescription medicines into my food. How do I know this? I have experienced a wide range of side effects described by serious-sounding announcers on TV commercials for prescription medications.
Drowsiness, joint pain, nausea, blurred vision (that one cleared up when I put on my glasses), diarrhea, irritability, headaches, loss of appetite, insomnia -- I have felt all of these and more over the last several weeks. Well, all the side effects except the four hour boner. I keep waiting on that one.
We all need something to brag about, even when we are being slowly poisoned.
Drowsiness, joint pain, nausea, blurred vision (that one cleared up when I put on my glasses), diarrhea, irritability, headaches, loss of appetite, insomnia -- I have felt all of these and more over the last several weeks. Well, all the side effects except the four hour boner. I keep waiting on that one.
We all need something to brag about, even when we are being slowly poisoned.
October 13, 2007
Weekend Cartoon
This has long been a feature of Fat in Indiana, suspended for a want of material, but I have enough for the next several weeks. All the cool kids are off doing their Deliverance Dance in Georgia, They ain't writing in the blogs today, so you have plenty of time to peruse my archives. Enjoy.
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