Liars and Hypocrites ( Yes I saw Godspell)

The liberal Left has long harped on the Separation of Church and State. You can read this position almost daily in the left-leaning blogs. Here is an example. Sadly, no such "wall" exists in the Constitution. Anyone who claims it does needs to head back to school and study Ninth Grade Civics. What the heck, in the spirit of improving education, I will give the complete Federal Position on the matter of Religion and Government:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;

In other words, the Federal Government cannot interfere in religion, either way, condoning or condemning. You can find that position in The First Amendment to the Constitution. Those sixteen words are the complete authority. The Federal Government cannot make an official religion, and they can't stop you from practicing whatever you desire.

In the spirit of the new Bi-partisan Obamafied US of A, ignore everything leading up to this sentence. After all, we are told the Old Conservative is dead. The Dems are large and in charge now and we better get with the program. OK.

Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg has long posited that the SCOTUS should take International law into consideration when making rulings. The same liberal viewpoint also is emphatic that there should exist a clear definitive wall of separation between Church and State.

I say let's go with that position. That means we cannot use taxpayer funds to put foot baths in the public restrooms at airports to accommodate those adherents of Islam. That means if the law says you need a picture on your driver's licence, then you do it sans bhurka. That means churches pay taxes. That means we need to bring International Law into consideration.

A court in the UK has ruled Environmentalism is a religion. As such, I demand we adhere to that stance.

This means immediately any Federal Laws, acts, or statutes that legislate environmental regulations must be stricken from the record. No CAFE standards, no bans on off-shore drilling. Any regulation put forth by the EPA is void. No more preserves for spotted owls, snail darters, or imaginary wetlands. There can no longer be limits on sulpher emmisions. Fire up the furnaces in those coal powered generators. No Federal Funds can be spent on "green" initiatives: no solar, no electric car, no windmills. The Federal Government has no place in Religion, remember?

Take heart my earth-loving friends. All is not lost. You see, I believe in the Constitution. Those pesky Ninth and Tenth Amendments can save you. Put your "green" initiatives before your State Legislatures! The separation thingy is a Federal Issue.

Oh, never mind. Those same Liberal Justices that found a "right" to abortion also gutted the Ninth and Tenth Amendments through the Commerce Clause and mis-applying the Fourteenth Amendment.

Sucks to be you.

Random Thursday Ramblings

Can we have a frank discussion? There are wants and there are needs. Sometimes the two intertwine. Here are some of my wants and/or needs:

a new car
a bigger/better house
better cars for my kids
a super-large flat screen TV
The HI-Def package including all of the movie channels for said TV
new Computer
new smart phone
a bigger/better GPS
a motorcycle
a really nice vacation
my humidor replaced and stocked with premium puros

You get the idea. Let us take a look at item one. A new car. My vehicle has 142,000 miles on it. It is starting to use oil. That means a ring job is in the future. I cannot afford a new car right now. I will have to find the money to have the engine worked on, being an automotive ignoramus. Eventually, this year or next, perhaps, if I am lucky, the following year I will have to replace the car. I will do it when I can afford to.

And that, my friends, is the message you should gleen from today's post. Sometimes you have wants. Sometimes you have needs. Sometimes you have to ignore both just to get by. You need to find a compromise. Our current Socialist-in Chief at the White the House seems unable to grasp this truism.

Perhaps we need health care reform. It could be we need to invest in green energy. Maybe we need to save the auto companies. These programs could be wants and maybe they are needs. It does not matter. The bottom line is we are already spending the hard earned money of our kids and grandkids and their kids. We cannot afford them in any case. The Government at all levels must cut spending.

Enough already. You can only tax the "rich" so many ways. Soon you are taxing us all. If you have a job, you will be classified as "rich". Just wait until the economy picks back up. The inflation of the Carter years will seem like the salad days.

Already nearly half of my pay goes to one form of taxes or another. We will just have to get by. Ignore the wants and examine the needs to see what is the minimum to get by. I have to do it.You have to do it. Why can't my local, state and federal governments give it a try?

Dining with the Hoosierboy

I filled up my favorite Peter Pan plastic cup with milk and added a tablespoon or two of Hershey's syrup. After a brisk stir I had the perfect accompaniment to my Stouffer's Mac and Cheese luncheon. Yes, it is good to be me.

Since I was bored, I spent my whole lunch hour marching around like Henry Hawk from the Warner Brothers Cartoons: chest out, rear back arms a-swingin'. A brassy Dhhn dhhn dhhn music in my brainpan accompanied every step. Maybe the image of Popeye going to kick Brutus' ass better gives the idea. You should have been here, it was a hoot. Try it. You cannot be in a bad mood when you are marching purposely like a cartoon character.

Maybe, just maybe, I am going nuts. Perhaps it is Mad Cow disease. Do you remember when that was the big panic-scare-were-all-gonna-die health issue? You know, the swine flu of its day. What is really weird was we were hit with the big swine flu scare already, back in the 1970's. Hey! -- No fair recycling baseless panics! Maybe that is why The Obama and the willing news media are jumping on the let us call it A1N1H37G or some other nonsensical name. We do not want to offend the mooselimbs with the idea they may be diseased with a pork product! BTW, the first "American" death from the not-to-be=named flu was in fact a Mexican toddler who came to the USA to get treatment for his sooper sekrit (do not call it swine) flu.

The commercial that most irritates me is currently on the radio. This couple is in a bar bitching about the smoke. She coughs and asks why the place is not smoke free. He says he does not know, but imagine all the people that are dying right before their eyes. Think of the chemicals. Let's go somewhere else, not choked with smoke says he. The commercial ends with a claim about the millions hundreds dozens untold number of people who die in Indianapolis from second-hand smoke.

Let me be clear. I smoke an occasional cigar. Outside. At home. I do not and never have smoked cigarettes. In fact I find them annoying. But if person owns his own business, he should be the one to determine if a legal substance can be used there. If you do not like smoke filled restaurants -- do not go there. To be honest, I find huge doses of cologne and perfume far, far more disgusting than cigarette smoke. How about we ban those?

It is cloudy and cool today. Back to the jeans after wearing shorts the past several days. Happy hump day interwebz buddies.

Dude, where is my car?

The alarm came on this morning at the appointed hour -- 6:11 am. The voices of the radio jokesters brought me from a deep sleep. Rarely have I been in so deep a slumber. It took at least a half an hour to clear the cobwebs from my mind.

I just finished a couple slices of white toast, slathered in butter and apricot preserves. I also had a handful of last night's leftover popcorn. The true breakfast of champions.

As I read the news this morning, it occurs to me the single largest factor in the financial woes of the automakers is the contract with the UAW (in a quick aside I should say I do not blame the workers for asking as much as I blame the Management for agreeing to the bloated contracts). Anyhoo, it looks like the massive donations to the Democrat party have paid off, the UAW now owns the car companies along with the Government. The UAW worker keeps his job and loses not a penny.

I am excited, the last time a Government owned a car company it was Communism's monument to central planning -- the Trabant. The car of the masses. The Trabant had a two-stroke engine (think lawnmower) and was made with a composite material filled with cotton fibers. Sometimes, it is reported, the manufacturer used cardboard when steel was short. Here is some of the high-quality manufacturing used in the Trabant:



This is the kind of manufacturing you can expect when the car companies are owned by the same people who run the BMV and the IRS.

I can't wait to own the new General Motors UAW Trabant Malibu Obamamobile:

Big Dick Nails It

Do yourself a favor and skip over to Big Dick's Place and read what he has written today.

Here is a link

Going for The One

I am pretty articulate too when I read everything. I would laugh my ass off if there were a computer glitch or power outage tonight so The One had to actually speak from the cuff.

I always said Arlen Specter was a douchebag.

Over at the Bash Brothers

Josh and Dave over at We are Superior to Everyone continue to show us mere mortals everything that is wrong in the world.

To summarize, if you are the Alabama Legislature, Hoosiers, or less than fervent supporters of the current First Lady, you are not up to snuff. In fact, they infer that if you do not kiss the ground touched by Mrs. Obama's dirty Keds you just may be retarded. I should add, after reading their well-reasoned diatribes, for the first time I am really proud of my country.

Today the arbiters of taste and correctness take on the world of Major League Baseball Blogs. Apparently, people with less knowledge than the Professors over at Old Men actually had the gall to comment at a public forum at MLblogs.com:

So at first, everything seemed great. We were getting hot scoops from completely random people with no real baseball knowledge or insight

When they ran across something they could not countenance, a Jew tracking fellow Jews in baseball. As Sam and Dave Josh and Drake Josh and Dave describe it:

a nonsensical compilation of everything all the Jews in Major League Baseball did on the diamond the day before.

Once again they have searched high and low to find a blog and offer their uninvited criticism. I know I am so much better off knowing that they think writing a blog about the interests of the author is a waste of time.

I hope these geniuses can take some time and tell me what blogs over there on the right in the blogroll are worthy of their shit stained thumbs up.

Maybe, they could, in their spare time, offer some criticism of the lame-brains in the White House ( It wasn't Michelle!) who thought it was a good idea to fly airliners at low level over NY City. The Obama must have good pics of Air Force One for his scrapbook, doncha know!

There is your update for today on who does not make the grade according to Dave and Josh.

I need your help, and this time I am serious

Help me here. After you read the previous post, did you get that the whole thing was written tongue-in-cheek or was I too obtuse?

You see the writer of a liberal blog was not sure if it was a gag or not. Help me out by voting in the poll over to the right.

In the meantime, according to my new liberal blogging buddy, we should apply the following logic:

1. If you did not vote for President Obama, you are stupid.
2. If you question President Obama's hypocrisy then:
a) The previous guys were far,far worse, so you are stupid
b) You are stupid
3. If you are from Indiana you are stupid
4. If you are from Alabama you are stupid
5. If you are not an ardent supporter of Michelle Obama you are retarded
6. If you are veteran we should be worried about you as a terrorist
7. Individuals should get on a budget and not overspend, but it is OK for the Government to spend trillions it does not have.

So in the interest of fairness I will type this real slow so that you can get it, old man. The preceding post was a gag. It may not have been funny, but I am willing to bet most of my readers knew I was not really creating a Dandelion Preserve.

A new environemntal movement

Yesterday was a beautiful day. As I was enjoying the sunshine it occurred to me I might not be as accepting of the "green" movement as I should. So, beginning today, I am creating a new initiative. I will not actively solicit contributions. You will not see me hosting infomercials or "walks" or star studded fundraisers. There will be no ribbons, car magnets or rubber bracelets. This will be a quiet protest to save a species. Join in as you see fit.

Sometimes man can be cruel. We have hunted the passenger pigeon and the sea cow to extinction. Massive herds of sperm whales no longer frolic in the ocean waves. Pandas, gorillas and giant squid are nearly extinct. The mighty grizzly once roamed the continent. The Sasquatch has not been seen in years. Most of us have never seen a Broom's pygmy possum or a giant California condor in the wild. No more are the jackalope or unicorn. Siberian Tigers and snow leopards are but few. Why even the northern Hairy-nosed Wombat and the Hawaiian Crow are on the endangered list.

Through conservancy, the American bison, bald eagle and even that terrifying killer and eater of young babes going to visit gramma, the wolf, all have a new lease on life. We are trying to save the last vestiges of the Amazon rain forest, even though it harbors deadly snakes.

Right here in Indiana there are more than 25 species of plants and animals that are considered endangered source. The list includes the Indiana Bat, the white catspaw,the copperbelly watersnake (good riddance) and the piping plover. Endangered plants include Mead's milkweed and the running buffalo clover.

Yet there is killing of certain plants going on right now in our country on a scale you cannot imagine. We are killing this plant by the millions. It is happening in your State, your city, your town, and perhaps in your neighborhood. I am talking about the Dandelion, natures little yellow ray of sunshine. This harmless little beauty springs up in your yard every spring, covering those nasty bare spots in your grass. Dandelions are a yellow carpet of softness. We marvel at the butterfly as it changes from a slimy caterpillar, yet we do not notice the dandelions change from yellow happiness to white cotton ball!

I know, dandelions are not as cute as a panda or as sexy as a koala (neither are even bears!). We worry about saving the tigers, but no one gives a fig about the plant worlds lion -- the Dandelion! That is why starting today I am creating the Hoosierboy Dandelion Preserve. Located right here on my own property the HDP will allow dandelions to live in their natural habitat among the crabgrass and wild violets.

Why should we save the dandelion? I will tell you. There is a lot of talk that certain man-made chemicals are destroying the environment. According to renowned scientists like Al Gore, if we do not move quickly the inhabitants of certain secret places and all polar bears (they are bears) will drown because the oceans will rise and we will all live in a new global-sized Sahara desert. I am told that plants, through a mysterious process, convert evil CO2 into oxygen! And get this --people and baby seals and tigers and whales all need oxygen to live. Save the dandelion and save your grandma. Save a baby kitten. Save a puppy. Do it for the children. Do it for the Iberian Lynx.

Help me in this fight to save the dandelion. Do you know the murder of this plant is so widespread there are even commercials on how to do it? There are even certain special chemicals marketed to help the murderers with their task? There are even people that brag there are no dandelions in their neighborhood. And some people try to claim bigotry is dead with the election of the all-knowing all wonderful messiah junior, one B Obama. I cry nay. As long as there are killings of dandelions I say hate exists.

I am still trying to gather evidence, but it is my firm belief the Final Plan to destroy the dandelion is a Right Wing Conspiracy. Follow me here. Conservatives live for the most part in rural areas and red states, while democrats and liberals inhabit the big cities and towns. Who is more likely to have a large yard? Who is more likely to frequent golf courses? Who is more likely to buy expensive killing chemicals to wipe out the fuzzy dandelion, natures happy pill? That is right -- the evil rich white guy conservative. I bet Rush Limbaugh and Glen Beck have nice, dandelion free lawns.

Do not be part of the conspiracy. Throw off those sheep's clothes and join with me. Save the dandelion. Do it for the yellow and the white.

Mixed up and jumbled

Man, am I sore. We moved my daughter from her crappy college house yesterday. Being a nice guy, and since I already had the U-Haul, I agreed to also move her roommate's larger pieces to the place to which she was moving since it was on the way. Of course, her bedroom was upstairs. I have jello legs this morning.

My daughter did not move home. She moved in with her boyfriend of four years. I am not sure how I feel about that. While we were moving, I started to make a joke, and let it go. We were hauling her mattress up the stairs (the stairs again) and she directed we just lean the bed against the wall until she could get the spare (guest) bedroom into shape. I was sorely tempted to ask her "but isn't this where you are sleeping?" I decided embarrassing her was not worth it.

Her boyfriend has a very nice job and a very nice house. It is way nicer than mine. In a much nicer neighborhood. I have to tell you I really like this guy, in spite of all my early efforts not to. I bet Dads with daughters can relate. But it is my little girl. I am pretty sure they will get engaged and married soon, and it is not like she just met the guy. I would be the worst hypocrite if I really complained, I had premarital sex too (but only once or twice). That is my version anyway. I think I will adopt the same attitude regarding my daughter as I did my parents. Denial. Or if all else fails I am sure if she does have sex, it is infrequent and she does not enjoy it. I have to cling to something here.

So now my little girl has officially moved from home. My oldest boy is staying at college to work this summer and will move into an apartment with friends in a few weeks. With him I can still have the illusion he lives here. Still, this house which seemed too small is getting bigger by the minute.

I started this piece O'crap blog shortly before she graduated high school. I wrote this Ode in one of my earliest posts. I am so happy she is starting a new life, yet I am worried my tears will short the keyboard. I am not one to talk about my feelings, heck I never even think about them. I do know I am mixed up today.

And sore. I am really, really sore.

Hey You

It is nice outside. It is Saturday. What are you doing surfing the net? Get off the copmputer now.

Weird Shit

I have gray hair. It does not bother me, I am old enough to have it. Most of my grey is on the sides of my head, above my ears and in the back. That part is almost all gray. The top is still dark with gray mixed in. The weird part is there is a clear line where the dark and gray meet. It is exactly where my Cubs hat ends and the visible hair is. It looks like I have a really bad wig, or maybe someone put a bowl on my head and dyed the lower exposed part gray. Weird. You can really see it when my hair is short. For the record, my hair is the same length all over.

Is that freaky or what?

Nevermore

It is Friday. The weather is supposed to be wonderful today -- highs in the 80s and sunny. It was already 71 at 6:00 am.

Things are so boring around here right now, it is a wonder any of you bother to stop by. I am down to reporting on the weather and what I ate for lunch.

This week I used lyrics from whatever song was either playing on my iPod or in my head when I wrote most of the posts. Can you identify the songs and artists? No fair using google or any other search engine.

So when youre near me, darling can't you hear me S.O.S.?

I stayed in the house most of yesterday. I made a quick trip to take a game my son rented to the video store and to get the stuff to make tacos.

The reason I stayed in was because it was Earth Day. I had an almost crack-addiction type urge all day to litter. I had a physical need to throw a bunch of trash along the road.

Is that wrong?

I guess I should mention I did not do it, but boy I wanted too.

My hands felt like two balloons

It is hump day and that means trash day at the old homestead. I put out the garbage, but I forgot about the big pile of yard waste beside the house. I guess I will get to it next week.

For lunch I had a bowl of broccoli cheese soup and a bit of last night's leftover roast beef. For dessert I had a slice of fresh pineapple with a very little chocolate sauce and a second syrup I made from apricot preserves boiled down with a little water. The combination of the three flavors was delicious. Some days I surprise myself.

I finally rid myself of the evil earworm Maniac yesterday afternoon. I woke this morning with the opening line floating around my brain yet again. What is going on?

I am I the only who finds it amusing that the President and his sycophant followers are dead set against pulling fraternity-type hazing on detainees and are almost universally appalled by the death penalty, but have no problem killing a baby when the mother is inconvenienced by a pregnancy that is caused in 99.999% of the time by her willing copulation?

The man in the suit has just bought a new car

I am a little late getting to posting today. The wife is riding me about my lack of activity during my mini-vacation. I have loaded and started the dishwasher and put in a load of laundry so far today. I might even run a dust cloth around and run the sweeper this afternoon. Then again, I might not.

The sun is trying to shine today, but it is still a chilly 52 degrees outside. We are still looking at temps in the 80s this weekend. I am ready to feel the power of old sol. We are moving our daughter from her college house this weekend, so the nice weather will be welcome.

Dear President Obama

I am sorry, but I do not share your moral outrage. If it stops one single American from being killed I am in complete favor of waterboarding. I am also OK with administering swirlies, snuggies, beefstews and putting Nair in the jockstraps of terrorists. If it stops a beheading I think we should put them in dog collars and take their picture in their underwear. Make them eat bacon and bologna. Show them the bottom of our feet. We should beat theirs with an iron pipe. To stop another 9/11 we should strike them with rubber hoses and pry out their fingernails. Spray them with a fire hose. I have no issue at all if we attach car batteries to their gonads. Take an eye, break a finger or toe. To save American lives, eviscerate, draw and quarter and hang them by the neck. You see, there is no life more valuable on this planet than that of an American.

I do not think we should apologize for treating people like the animals they are who blow up little kids, punish rape victims with death, fly planes into buildings and take complete delight in killing the innocent. Cowardly goat fuckers who put bombs in discotheques and pizza parlors, those who take schoolkids hostage have no rights. They gave up their rights as human beings the moment they chose to strap on the bombs, or plan the murders of those who fail to follow the teachings of an 8th Century paederast. There is a place in Hell for those who plan and carry out such attacks. The next room over is reserved for those who let it happen.

I'm just a steeltown girl on a Saturday night

The furnace is running. It is sleeting outside. It is April, for AlGore's sake. We went to the baseball game and froze our butts off last night. The temp was in the 40s with a light rain and strong west wind. My sweatshirt was not enough. Some people had on winter coats -- they were the smart ones.

I have that song Maniac from Flashdance bouncing around in my skull this morning. That is not a good thing.

I am hungry this morning. There is a can of Dinty Moore stew crying my name. Will I be able to hold out for lunch, or will that combo of rich gravy, veggies, and meat-like stuff be slopped down my gullet for breakfast?

If it quits raining I might get a haircut today. Decisions, decisions...

In other words

I fried up some breaded tenderloins last night. I baked a batch of mac and cheese and some biscuits to go along. I did not make a veggie since I am the only one that would eat them, and I was not in the mood. Hey, I am 47, its OK to skip an occasional vegetable. An indifferent store-bought cherry pie rounded out the feast.

I ate a leftover tenderloin for lunch with a large glass of Big Red. Frank Sinatra crooned in the background. I slathered a leftover biscuit with apricot preserves and enjoyed a lunch fit for a king.

What are you eating today?

Mountains come out of the sky and stand there

Happy Monday. It is a cold rainy day here in the heart of Hoosierland. The weather dude said we have had more than four inches of rain already this month. It is forecast to rain through Wednesday. There is promise of a big warm-up later in the week.

This is my week off from work, sans pay. I filed for unemployment on-line this morning. I will not get anything, but now I am set to get my $390 per week if the company does this nonsense again this year. The wife has a big list of stuff she thinks I am going to do this week. I think I might have thrown it away. It was an accident, I thought it was trash.

Did you see the pictures of Your President giving that Commie Bastard Chavez a "soul handshake". Does that guy have no sense of class? Just think, GW was castigated for being a stupid, redneck buffoon with no gravitas or moral authority. He was portrayed as an embarrassment to the world, with no respect from other Government's leaders. At least he did not gift the PM a bunch of CDs and and bow to a Saudi King and act all "brother" with a fucking lunatic. Had this been Bush, some of you hypocrites from the left would have dropped four hundred words about the shame of it all in your blogs, and the MSM would have a feeding frenzy for weeks on end. I can respect people whop take a stand, no matter how ill-conceived or poorly thought out.

I hate hypocrites.