March 18, 2010

Dear Readers

I know times are tough economically, so I have a business deal for you.

Houses in my neighborhood are renting in excess of $1,00 per month. I have very nice house for rent for a mere $500 per month. You will save a bunch! The only catch is we will need a ten year lease, but with the savings I am offering that is a no-brainer.

I will also throw in your monthly groceries. I will pay today's market prices for your necessities at the nearby store. Now how this works is I will pay today's sale price for your groceries after you move in. if the store raises its prices or no longer offers an item, I will increase taxes increase the rent to make up the difference. I will decide the amount of ncrease. But you are getting a house, provided by me!

The lease will start in July 2010 and run through July 2020. Your first monthly payment is due on July 1, 2010. You will authorize me to take the funds directly from your checking account if you do not pay me on time. As soon as you sign the lease I will tell about the property. You will appreciate the amenities, trust me.

You will be able to move in on July 1, 2014. That date may change to 2016.

You must lease this property sight unseen. Since your neighbors are not excited about having renters nearby, you will have to kick in a hundred dollars to them to get them to agree. I will get you their addresses in Nebraska and Louisiana.

I am sure you will agree this is a great idea. You will save $500 per month and perhaps get a better place to live.

I should add if you do not agree with this lease, you will go to jail.

Who in their right mind would agree to such a crazy plan? Who would think this is a good idea? Why, your typical Obama supporter. Obama Care offers the same basic plan. Pay for it for 4-6 years and then you can get the benefits.

And those guys call us stupid fat rednecks.

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