On this date thirty-nine years ago the most beautiful woman in the world decided I was adequate enough to actually marry me.
I am a lucky man.
There were these two elderly people living in a Florida mobile home park.
He was a widower and she was a widow.
They had known one another for a number of years.
Now, one evening there was a community supper in the big activity centre.
These two were at the same table, across from one another.
As the meal went on, he made a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered up his courage to ask her,
“Will you marry me?”
After a dramatic pause and precisely six seconds of ‘careful consideration,’ she answered.
“Yes. Yes, I will.”
The meal ended and with a few more pleasant exchanges and they went to their respective places.
Next morning, he was troubled. “Did she say ‘yes’ or did she say ‘no’?”
He couldn’t remember.
Try as he would, he just could not recall. Not even a faint memory.
With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her.
First, he explained to her that he didn’t remember as well as he used to.
Then he reviewed the lovely evening past.
As he gained a little more courage, he then inquired of her,
“When I asked if you would marry me, did you say ‘Yes’ or did you say ‘No’?”
He was delighted to hear her say,
“Why, I said, ‘Yes, yes I will’ and I meant it with all my heart.”
Then she continued,
“And I am so glad that you called because I couldn’t remember who had asked me.”
|From my windshield|
An atheist became incensed over Christmas holiday preparations.
He filed a lawsuit about the constant celebrations given to Christians and Jews while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.
The case was brought before a judge.
After listening to the long, passionate presentation by the atheist’s lawyer, the judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case dismissed!”
The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling.
“Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter, and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur, and Hanukkah. Yet, my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!”
The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously, your client is too confused to know about, much less celebrate his own atheist holiday!”
The lawyer pompously said, “Your honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be?”
The judge replied, “Well, it comes every year on exactly the same date. Psalm 14:1 states, ‘The fool says in his heart, there is no God.’
Thus, if your client says there is no God then, according to the Bible, he is a fool.
April Fool’s Day is his holiday. Now, get out of my courtroom!”
We dodged some storms yesterday. There was severe weather including large hail to the north and tornadoes to the south. Those tornadoes hit very near where there was a major strike in March. Mother Nature must hate the south Indy suburbs.
This one looked straight out of the special effects department for a modern Oz. We got a little rain in the morning and a few sprinkles in the evening storms, not enough to even wet the pavement. Luckily, no one was killed in the storms.
I’m having a hard time getting excited about work this week. I’m looking forward to the long holiday weekend. I took off next Monday, so I will have four days off. I’m thinking about taking Friday too. Not for any reason, just because. The really sad part is if I do, I will be bored to death and will end up working anyway. Like many Americans, I have a work problem.
That is enough of this nonsense for today. Have a great one!
It looks to be a warm typical June-like Saturday. We have no particular plans until this evening. Back in March, my wife bought tickets to see Jeff Foxworthy for my birthday and the show is tonight.
Last evening we went to the cinema, and yet again encountered members of the genpop who have no idea how to behave in public settings. From the lady a few seats down from my wife who clearly subscribed to the more is better theory when it comes to splashing on eye-watering amounts of perfume to the buffoon the row in front of us who could not understand the huge difference in viewing a movie at the theater and his living room couch. I have never wanted to smack someone about the race and head as much as this guy. He couldn’t shut his pie hole the entire movie, and he was not whispering either. *
As we were leaving, this jerkwad was telling his wife he would gather their trash, it is what he does, he is a mule. My sweet wife, who never says anything unkind muttered, “Well you are an ass anyway”. Score one for the spouse. It took a great deal of self-restraint to not confront this ill-mannered moron as we left the theater.
I listened to a combination of audiobooks and music during my 13 plus hours in the car this week. I cranked the volume when this tune came on my playlist. I haven’t heard it in ages.
Have a great Saturday.
*This jerk actually shouted “Yes, Yes” and raised his arms as if he was Rocky at the denouement of the film.
I wish I could claim I was on drugs. I am not sure where this came from, but this is a post from June of 2006. Comments, if any, are lost. This is some strange stuff.
Like every day this week I woke up early. I don’t know why. I am sure you do not know either. That means the opening to this post is mere complaint. I have become the Karen of blogging. I would like to see the manager about waking every day at 5:30, please.
I will have to pause in my one-fingered typing on the little iPad keyboard a little more often this morning. My favorite Yeti cup is dirty, so I am drinking from a ceramic travel mug instead. The ceramic cup does not keep the java hot as long. I do not enjoy cold coffee. Yes, I could have washed the Yeti cup. What is your point?
We are heading off this afternoon to our friends’ to hang out at their pool. Beer, cigars, and laughter are all in the plans. I can live with that. It is good to be me. It is better to have friends with nice stuff who are willing to share. I will, of course, bring my own beer and stogies. We will also bring snacks. The wife is not a heathen, and she has trained me to behave in polite society. Mostly.
A new cookie store opened nearby. We decided to stop and try out the place the other evening. Two girls/young women were in front of the store posing with their open box of cookies for pictures. I suppose it was an Instagram post. My first thought was “why?”, who cares what you are going to eat. My second was “so what, it doesn’t affect me at all”. Whatever, girls, whatever. The name of the franchise is a bit strange; Dirty Dough. I don’t think they paid a marketing expert a lot of cash to come up with that moniker. It doesn’t make you want to rush out and grab an overpriced treat.
I am in a country frame of mind this morning.
Have a great Saturday.
For those of you who are long time readers you know I always offer well-reasoned opinion and sound advice. If I am wrong, I readily admit it.
I will, should it happen.
This year I am going to tell you exactly what your man wants for Father’s Day. He wants some biscuits and sausage gravy for breakfast. He wants some nookie without asking. He wants a steak for dinner, should you forego making the B&G in order to get him the nookie before the kids get up.
That’s it. Do that and you are golden.
I had some weird dreams last night. I will not detail them here; dream accounts are monumentally boring. Frankly, I don’t know what Freud was thinking when he studied dreams. Why, just why? Perhaps that is why his theories are so much nonsense — gibberish in, gibberish out.
Yesterday was a good day at work. I won the business on a new project and received a request for quotation on another very large one : three million pieces per year!
The weather has turned nice and seasonally warm. I can live with that.
In all, a boring post, but so it goes.
To liven up the old blog I think I’ll post some music relating to dreams. Several choices come to mind. This tune won out:
If you don’t like Roy Orbison, you probably shouldn’t read this blog.
Okay, that was probably a little bit extreme. You are all welcome to read here, but I will think a bit less of you.
An elderly couple visits a doctor
The doctor says to the old man,
“I’ll need a urine sample, a feces sample, and a blood sample.”
The old man says, “What?”
The doctor repeats himself.
Once again the old man says, “what?”
So the doctor yells it,
“I NEED A URINE SAMPLE, A FECES SAMPLE, AND A BLOOD SAMPLE!”
With that the old woman turns to the old man and says,
“He said needs a pair of your underwear!”
It was only a few seconds later that I heard a rustle in the flower bed behind me, on the other side of the grill. Another bunny ran up, stopped beside my chair and looked around. I did not move. He followed the first hare but stopped to nibble beside the playhouse.
A third rabbit ran past my chair, startled the second one, and ran behind the playhouse. The second rabbit ran towards the back fence. The third bunny sat in the grass, looking around. At one point he too stood on his back legs to stare at me. I went back to my book. Finally, a few pages later, the third rabbit hopped off in the path of the first rabbit.
And that, my friends, is exactly why I did not bother to plant a garden this year.
Yesterday was the wife’s redacted birthday. The grandgirls helped me bake a chocolate cake. We did not do much celebrating, the girls had their dance recital last night. Both did great. I did take the wife for a steak dinner on Wednesday.
The baseball season is about a third of the way complete. The Cubs are ten games under .500. I cannot look forward to the NFL season, I have no hope the Colts will be competitive. So it goes.
It looks to be decent weather Saturday, so I hope to get some more yard work done. Sunday may bring some much needed rain. In the meantime, I have work today. The paying kind.
I had a couple of professional writers take a look at the opening portion of my someday novel. Both gave me valuable insight. I think I may start a new blog and publish it in sections. Stay tuned and watch the sidebar. BTW, it is mostly complete. Now it needs significant editing. The end needs a bit more flesh, but it is done in principle.
Here is some music for your Friday. Since it is apparently some sort of law we must acknowledge the alphabeters, here is the Queen himself:
One of the issues of the “woke” crowd is cultural appropriation. We are told that a person of one race adopting the culture, dress, or language of another culture is wrong. Pale skin red head with dreadlocks? Nope. White guy playing a Native American in a Western? Uh-uh.
But then why is okay for a person of apparent African American decent to portray Cathryn of Arygon in the Broadway musical Six?
Can only White People be guilty of cultural appropriation? Is there a list of rules somewhere, so I can keep up?
I remember one time when I was home visiting my folks. My mom asked me to set the table for dinner. I opened the refrigerator and taped to the inside of the door was a risque picture of a lovely, slender, perfectly built, but scantily-clad young woman.
“Mom, what’s this?” I asked.
“Oh, I put that up there to remind me not to overeat,” she answered.
“Is it working?” I asked.
“Yes and no,” she explained. “I’ve lost 15 pounds, but your dad has gained 20!”
I had a busy day yesterday. I cut the lawn and power washed the front porch and the back patio. And of course, later in the evening when I went to sit on said patio, I noticed a bird had crapped all over the place. It is as if he sat on the gutter and dropped diarrhea right outside the patio door.
Now it is on to Monday.
I will fire up the old laptop n a few minutes to deal with work stuff. Technically, I am on vacation today and tomorrow, but that is how things go usually. I was replying to emails from China at eleven last night. That is common too. That is certainly not a complaint, but a statement of fact. That is why I did not feel bad for not working when I got home from Detroit last Friday afternoon. Besides, I left home early on the previous Sunday.
We are watching the grandgirls all week while mom and dad are out of town. So far I think everyone has had fun. We went to the zoo on Monday and the wife took them to the pool on Tuesday. I am not sure of the activity schedule for the next two days, but I am open to whatever. Those girls are sweeties.
I have had issues with my phone lately, the screen will not kick on with e home button and it has battery life problems. I wanted to wait to replace it for a few months, but so it goes. I have a new iPhone 14 arriving today. It will take some time to get adjusted to Face ID instead of my thumbprint, for sure. And this means reconnecting with all of my Bluetooth devices. What a pain. But that is modern technology.
Go forth, and have a great Thursday. I will take recommendations for Not Friday Music in the comments. It is likely I will ignore your suggestions, but you never know.