August 1, 2017

A Post for Me

My daughter is beautiful, smart, and stronger than anyone I know. She lost two babies before giving birth to my wonderful granddaughter. The first was ectopic and she was not even sure she was pregnant. The second died at 12 weeks. This is a pain only a broken-hearted mother can ever know.

Right now she is carrying her fourth baby. She is 20 weeks in. He is a boy. Little Sawyer Timothy isn't going to make it. The angel in charge of putting him together must have been distracted for a moment. The details are not important. The chromosomal anomaly is exceedingly rare. The important organs are not forming as they should. The experts have clinically detailed that Sawyer likely will not survive to term, and for only a few days outside the womb if he does. Yet he kicks and moves clings to life with tenacious spirit.

The little guy might be less than perfect outside, but I know he is all his parents and sister and grandparents could ever hope for on the inside, where it counts. A rare twist of genetic fate will take him from us before we ever get a chance to know him.

I'm heartbroken. My wife is despondent. I have no idea how my daughter and son-in-law can bear it. How will my daughter make it through each day when people ask about her baby, knowing cruel fate has already left its mark? I cannot imagine.

Why? It does not matter why. Random chance, genetic mishap, plain bad luck. I do not question God. I only pray to give everyone strength in the coming days, weeks, and months. If you are so inclined, a prayer to ease the baby's pain and to help his mom and dad would be appreciated.

I have not shared much of my personal life this year. Trust me when I tell you that 2017 sucks.

In the meantime, the usual frivolity, nonsense, braggadocio, and shallowness that make up the bulk of content around here seems a bit pointless and more than a little trite.

12 comments:

Melissa said...

I am sorry and will be thinking of your family. 2017 JH as not been a good year at all Dec 31 cannot come soon enough.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry to hear that. Nothing can be said that will heal the hurt.


James Old Guy

Cindi said...

I a so, so sorry to hear of your pain. I understand. I lost my son at five months. It's a pain only a mother can understand. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

Cappy said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I hope God will help you and your family to get through this.

Jean said...

So very, very sorry, Joe.
Heartfelt prayers for strength to you and your family.

Ed Bonderenka said...

Prayers your way my friend.
Scherie has a daughter she'll never meet in this life and knows the pain.
Still.

B said...

Prayers for your daughter.

And her parent's and husband too.

Plus the little one.

Anonymous said...

I have a child waiting for me in Heaven, too. I'm so very sorry for all of you and you are all in my prayers.

T

Joe said...

My heartfelt thanks to all of you

Your kindness means more than you will ever know

CGHill said...

There is nothing worse. My sister gave birth twice; neither of them lived more than a few hours. And after that, she didn't want to anymore.

Rita said...

I'm so sorry Joe. I cannot imagine what she is going through. I cannot imagine what you are going through. I live and breathe our grandkids since I was never lucky enough to to have a child of my own. Now they are 15 and 12. I miss those sweet baby/toddler years.

Prayers, my friend.

Joe said...

Again, thanks to all for your kind words

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