June 30, 2006

Dear James Old Guy


Is it possible to remove the Hoosier from someone? An operation, divorce, some sort of ritual that requires naked women, alcohol and feathers? The hoosier in me is beginning to surface again like a recurring case of the crabs. Also what can you tell me about the Ghost Dance and the Sioux uprising of 1890?
James Old Guy | Homepage | 06.29.06 - 10:20 am | #


No. Once a Hoosier, always a Hoosier. You will never completely shuck that strange, half Kentucky, half Chicago accent. You will not be able to flush your system of the days in the woods, the swims in the river, jumping off the bridge, riding the freight train into town. The bike rides, the sectionals, the pool halls and cigarettes all blend with the voice of old Sid on the radio doing the Indy 500 to leave a mark inside your body and soul. Like an old tattoo on your bicep, it may blur, and wrinkle, and the mermaid loses her luster. In the end you are indelibly a Hoosier to the core. Somewhere in your mind you will cross the Wabash and the strains of "Back Home Again" will echo in your skull. You will live in the mountains, you will camp by the sea, yet the flat corn fields will call to you. Being a Hoosier is like getting a case of VD. Sometime, somewhere, you will brag about it.

Sorry, only one question allowed, so you will have to learn about the Great Sioux Uprising another day.

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