Late last night I was watching some show about deadly African animals. Through the front door came an invader. He was big and black and he was proclaiming his need for a woman. He moved down the hall to where the wife was sleeping and I chased him. He shouted he was horny and was going to get some. I tracked him through the darkened house, my weapon at the ready.
I caught him outside the door and gave him a beating he will never forget. I left him crippled and oozing blood.
Then I scooped the black bastard up with the flyswatter and tossed him in the toilet.
Did I forget to mention he was a cricket? Not the Buddy Holly kind.