August 6, 2007

TMI Monday

Thunder rumbles, but the rain is no more than sprinkles. I woke early again this morning, but as I sir here in the dark reading blogs and online news I realize I still have nothing to offer. I could update my template, there are few of you I need to add.

Saturday I had a call from Jerry at Back Home Again, but we were unable to meet up as we were just heading out the door to go back-to-school shopping. Whoo wee and whoo hoo. I do not possess the vocabulary to describe the fun we had.

We went to the root beer stand for lunch yesterday. The old fashioned kind, where they bring out the tray and hang it from your window. I deviated from my usual coney dog or double cheeseburger and ordered a BLT. I forgot to tell them no mayo, my error, so I scraped off what I could. As soon as I ate the sandwich I developed a pain in my gut. I spent most of last evening farting heavy foul smelling plumes of sulfuric gas that hung suspended in the air for minutes at a time. Even I thought they stunk. After watching the Cubs and the news I went to bed where the malodorous mustard gas woke me on occasion. This morning the gas has turned and churned in my intestines to create a tepid oozing diarrhea that explodes into the bowl. I am now forced to endure cramps, massive double-flusher shits and the indignity of having to clean the bowl after every dump. Bending over the lingering odor makes me want to barf. I think I may be sick.

No comments:

Consider everything here that is of original content copyrighted as of March 2005
Powered By Blogger