Hotel points, frequent flyer miles and adventures in traveling

There was a time when I traveled a lot. I woke in a hotel room 3-4 mornings each week and found myself in a flying metal tube 100 plus times each year. I visited most of the USA and got to see much of the world on the company's dime. I also was on the road as my kids grew up.  That I regret more than anything. But in fairness to myself, I rarely missed an important event, concert, play, or big game. But I missed out on every day life.

Now I travel much less. I spend about one night a week in a hotel and fly about once a month. There are road warriors out there who put me to shame, but I think it is fair to say I have spent more time in strange beds than your average bear. Note to reader: I originally had a metaphor about hookers and strange beds here but I could not make it work).

In my travels I never fail to be amazed at the capacity for human beings to be rude, selfish assholes. Yesterday morning I encountered what I call the early morning douchebag. This guy or gal makes their appearance about fifty percent of the time I am in a hotel. They exit their room and decide to stop and have a conversation on their phone or with a colleague right outside my door -- usually at 6:30 or so in the morning. Everyone in the hall gets to hear their brilliance. While I usually stay in decent, but not top tier hotels (think Hampton Inn, Hilton Garden, Courtyard, etc.), the doors are not usually soundproofed against assholery.

I will not further waste your time ranting about the asshats who occupy every table in the airport food court at dinnertime, typing on their laptop or watching movies on their iPad, while some of us wander in vain looking for a place to actually put down our tray of airport barbecue and eat. This happens to me regularly at the Charlotte airport. I also am exposed to the people who find it necessary to have a long and loud phone conversation in the boarding lounge. I have heard about medical conditions, finances, personal details to make anyone blush, and the minutiae of business deals. Don't those folks know everyone can hear them on the phone? Sometimes these jerks even use speakerphone! Once, at the Philadelphia airport, a guy was going over the details of his impending bankruptcy while on speakerphone with his attorney!

There are the people who cannot grasp the idea of a carry-on bag, like the guy who put his bag under the seat of the woman across the aisle (he "did not want it to take up his foot room", he explained to the attendant). I once watched a woman wheel a cart up to the Jetway door piled with luggage. This is back when you were allowed two bags and a purse, etc. She had a baby in a stroller with her.  When the gate agent questioned the pile of luggage the rude passenger explained, "I have two bags for me, two bags for her (pointing at the baby) and a purse for each of us.  The purse (purses?) were the size of small duffel bags. Boarding was halted for almost ten minutes as the woman argued. A supervisor was called and we all waited while the bitch made multiple trips to store her luggage on the plane. The lesson here is that if you fly first class you really can get away with almost anything.

After twenty years on the road, my stories are almost endless. I probably should have named this blog adventures in traveling. Then this piece o'crap blog would have had a purpose beyond self aggrandizement and  navel gazing.