September 29, 2019

My feets are tired

Happy Sunday. It was a bit warm last night but not miserably so. For those of you that haven't stopped by for a while, my AC broke a couple of weeks ago.

We met some friends up at a fall festival yesterday. It was held in a small town about 20 miles away. There was lots of flea market stuff, crafts, music, and food. The carnival trucks were in full force. Elephant ears, pork on a stick, Italian sausage, lemon shake ups, kettle corn, and cotton candy were in abundance.

It was hot, around 90, with 100% humidity, so to accompany the smells of fried stuff was a underlying sense of sweat. I could not understand the people wearing sweatshirts, unless they misunderstood the concept. Those who brought their dogs should be forced to wear a fur coat and walk barefoot on the pavement.

In all we had a good time.

September 28, 2019

Everybody Wants Some

Deep fried sugar cream pie
A bite is missing . I couldn’t wait until after I took a picture to dig in.

I know most of you have never heard of sugar cream pie. It is a Hoosier thing. Kinda like breaded tenderloins.

More details of my field trip later

Hot with a 30% chance of sarcasm

Happy Saturday. It looks to be a hot one with even warmer days --possibly record setting -- coming early next week. Oh noes, Global Warming! We're all gonna die. We may have to schlep a few miles down theroad to sleep in my daughter's air conditioning.

Looking out my blog room window in the early morning light I notice the neighbor's maple is turning to a greenish yellow on the topmost branches. Fall is here, my friends, the thermometer notwithstanding.

As for political news, no matter what you think of the President, are we really gonna throw him out based on a complaint that is no more than second-hand gossip and innuendo not even worthy of a high school girls backbiting? Seriously, can we at least hear from someone who was actually there for the phone call?

We are off to wander around at a small town fall festival today. Food truck food and high carb junk are on tap,. My heart is set on some deep-fried sugar cream pie, diabetes be damned. 

Have a great day.

September 27, 2019

True love


Choosing a wife 

A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among
three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.

The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up
very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.

The man was impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent
all the money on him because she loves him so much.

Again, the man is impressed.


The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for
their future because she loves him so much.

Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her.

Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.

Men are like that, you know.


This is a rerun from 2005

September 26, 2019

That is a long time to let something fester

A couple of days ago I got a comment on a post from August of 2005. This was not a spam comment, but a real "you are wrong and here is why" comment to a political post.

I would hope that if it took me 14 YEARS to compose a comment, it would be at least a little polished. Seriously, 169 months is a long time to let something bother you. I guess you were tied up with that opinion piece on the Gulf of Tonkin Incident.

Yes, I published it. No, I did not offer rebuttal.

September 25, 2019

Only hot buttered popcorn could make it better

So the rabid lefties who could not accept the fact they lost the last election are going to try and impeach Trump for something, but trust them, it is egregious. Worst thing ever by a President. Nothing like actually using the IRS to target political enemies mind you. Way way way worser. They haven't seen the complaint offered up by a partisan "whistleblower" ( leaker if the President was Democrat), nor have they seen a transcript of the call to the Ukranian President, but they know it is grounds to throw the Trumpster out of the White House with a resounding and satisfying "You're Fired".

Trust me, reporters who are not nearly as clever as they think already have that very headline written.

What the never Trumpers don't get is that the root of the scandal involves the Democrat front-runner; the one guy who polls indicate could actually win. Do the impeachers really think the whole nepotism strong-arm tactics Joe bragged about while veep to get his son some serious foreign cash won't come out? 

How do you think the union guy is going to react to Biden using government power to get an alleged coke-head $55K a month compared to the guy trying to get the dirt about it? Which is more disgusting? 

Go ahead, eat your own. 

I'll have popcorn.

September 23, 2019

Too Blue To Fly

It must have been in 2003 or maybe 2004 when I won a couple of free songs on a soda pop cap to download songs from something called iTunes. I bought "For what it is worth" because it is one of the few songs I know all of the words and I sang it often to my youngest boy. The other was Hank Williams' "I'm so lonesome I could cry". The latter is one of the saddest, simple, and haunting tunes ever written. Ever. In any genre.

Despite the opening paragraph, I am not a devotee of country music. I am stuck deep in the classic rock rut, and I don't think that will change. I do wander over to the country station on occasion to skip radio commercials, but outside of select songs that is about it in my music collection.

I have been watching the new Ken Burns documentary on country music. Like most of his work it is solid history. Perhaps a little too much emphasis on African Americans, but Burns often does that. It does not distract from the narrative, nor does it mean the history isn't accurate. I am really enjoying this series.

I watched a couple more recorded episodes yesterday morning. Hank's tragic death and miraculous career was covered in the 3rd episode. I knew, but didn't remember, that Hank was but 29 when he died in the backseat of his Caddy on the way to a show. Like so many of the true musical geniuses, he burned hot and fast, flaming out early.

Anyway, Hank's tune is playing on an endless loop in my brain right now. I don't think that is a bad thing.

September 22, 2019

Wake up Maggie

I'm up in the blog room/office. The windows are open and the ceiling fan is spinning away. Crickets are chirping outside. The distant tree frogs offer a pleasant counter melody. A few lingering cicadas provide a steady backbeat to the nighttime song. In an hour or so the birds will add their good morning chorus.

The wife is asleep on the couch in the family room, the ceiling fan is offering some relief from the heat of the lingering summer. The master bedroom has no fan on the cathedral ceiling. Since the family room opens directly on the open concept kitchen, I thought it best to let her sleep instead of making my morning cuppa Joe. Forgive my incoherent narrative, I'm operating without caffeine so she can sleep. At least for a while. Ain't I a swell guy?

In sports news, the Cubs $20+ million dollar closer has been offering up balls over the fence like a pitcher at the home run derby. He gave up 2 dingers on 2 straight pitches to allow the evil Cards to take a one run lead in the ninth. The Northsiders could not answer and lost yet another game. Time is running out in the season. That is 5 straight loses.

Sorry about the poor me post yesterday. Some days the crushing weight of the situation becomes too much. I appreciate your kind words. 'Nuff said about that.

Have a great Sunday.

September 21, 2019

A Saturday Pity Party

The 1969 Miracle Mets only came to being after a monumental end of season collapse by the Chicago Cubs.

Today's Cubs have been celebrating the Hall of Famer loaded '69 squad's 50th Anniversary. Does that mean the current Cubs have to emulate the end of season collapse as well? They are certainly doing a great impression.

In other news the run of bad luck here at the homestead continues as the air conditioner crapped out yesterday afternoon. The compressor runs but the fan on the outside unit is not working. I suppose it is the motor? I don't know, I have no HVAC training. The unit is 20 years old, so I should not be surprised. We can live without AC. It will suck with temperatures slated to push 90 this weekend. The rain forecasted for Sunday means windows might have to be shut.

The past five years have sucked like a sump pump. Outside of the birth of my 2 granddaughters there hasn't been much to look at as a high point.

2014 company sold lost my job
Got a new job at a pay cut
2016 learned I was going blind. Five surgeries later I can see (plus/minus)
2017 lost another job as mismanagement ruined the company
Got another job at a pay cut
2017 my grandson died
2018 My mother died
2019 lost my job yet again when the company lost 2 major customers

We are suposed to hang with friends today. I will paint a fake smile on my face and give every outward indication that I'm having fun.  Who knows, maybe I will actually enjoy myself.

Yeah, I know others have had it far worse and I am truly blessed. I have a lot to be thankful for.

Don't worry. By Monday I will shed the poor me attitude and face the new week with determination. It will be sweaty determination to be sure, but you know what I mean.

September 20, 2019

Easy scalloped potatoes

Bleeping Cubs.

I know. I need to lower my expectations. Chicago gave me the one Series win I deserve in my lifetime. I can complain in another 105 years or so.

New subject.

It is either reassuring or disconcerting to know the snarky and snide aspect of personality is alive and well. I have tried to temper it around here, but it came out in full force yesterday in correspondence. I only partially regret my acerbic comments, which proves I'm still a self-righteous jerk deep down.

Gotta keep working on that.

New Subject.

It looks to be a beautiful weekend, hot and muggy to end summer officially. We have been invited to a pool party. It has been a lousy week. I could use a distraction.

New subject.

I had a couple of interviews for a position earlier in be month and ultimately was told the company chose a different candidate. So it goes. Until I saw the same job opening newly listed yesterday. WTH?  And no, this is not where I exhibited my own brand of sarcastic commentary referenced above.

New subject.

No politics today.

You are welcome.

Have a great Friday.

September 19, 2019

A conversation with liberal me

Yeah, I am still alive. I have weather. The media is still no more reliable than Pravda. The Democrat Party leadership still tells us "We like America, let's change everything about it".  Anyway I hope you are having a good morning.

Don't wish me good morning. My morning hasn't been good and your salutation makes me uncomfortable and just reinforces your morning privilege. Besides, not everyone is celebrating morning at the same time. It is evening in China and you are insensitive to those in other time zones.

Boy, being a SJW snowflake is exhausting.

Don't call me a snowflake. Do you know there are people in Equatorial Africa who have never seen snow? Besides snow is associated with people in Northern latitudes and hey mostly have white skin...

Geez

Geez is a substitute for "Jesus". Don't force your religion on me.

Don't get all hot and bothered

How can I not get hot with the anthropomorphic climate change endangering every life on the planet, specifically targeting people of color.

Just forget it, this isn't working

We agree, the only work done since America's founding in 1619 was accomplished by slaves. You did not build that, African ancestors did under systematic bondage reinforced by whips, chains, and patriarchal rape.

I just want to shoot myself

Exactly! That is why we need to ban these scary , military assault machine guns and rocket launchers anyone can buy off the street, even if they have a history of mass murder and armed robbery.

What?

Fox News! NRA! Trump! Bush! Racist!

I give up

September 17, 2019

Come to Mamma

Yeah I took it

Never gets old

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver’s license?
Driver: I don’t have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Officer: May I see the owner’s card for this vehicle?
Driver: It’s not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That’s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner’s card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There’s a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That’s where I put it after I shot the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.
Officer: There’s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.
Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:
Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.
Captain: Who’s car is this?
Driver: It’s mine, officer. Here’s the registration.
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there’s a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there’s no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there’s a body in it.
Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body.
Captain: I don’t understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn’t have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove-box, and that there was a body in the trunk?
Driver: Yeah, and I’ll bet the big liar told you I was speeding too!

A proposal

Does anyone think the Democrats will stop their attempts at disarming law-abiding Americans if we agreed on a "buy back" of  one or two models (I would never agree, but play along just for the sake of argument)?

First off how can one " buy back" something they never sold? Who sets the price? The more guns are purchased and taken out of circulation, the more scarce they become, thus the higher the price. 

Since rifles make up a fraction of gun crimes and murders, you can bet handguns will be next on the list. 

Not that I would ever agree, but what gun-grabber liberal will pledge that if I give up my "assault rifle", they will agree in a Constitutional Amendment no other firearms will ever be on a "buy back" or confiscation list. 

That is what I thought.

September 16, 2019

Still my favorite


...Cars song

RIP Rik

All the rock n rollers are dying off

September 15, 2019

Where is the band?

We had a great day with the grandgirls yesterday. We went to the venerable kids place Chuck E Cheese for some bad pizza and an afternoon of fun. The oldest girl had a blast. The baby did her baby thing, but was excellent. She loved watching the crowd. Since I last stepped foot in a Chuck E. Cheese about 20 years ago, I was a bit surprised to find the animatronic band has been discarded. I suppose a weaselly Yoko ingratiated herself on the purple gorilla and split up the group.

We went to the oldests' favorite restaurant (Spaghetti Factory) for dinner. The youngest wouldn't tell us her choice, opting for a dinner of formula instead. The girls then spent the night. As an added bonus the baby slept through the night!

Why would you care about any of this? I have no idea. I have wondered why anyone stops by for a very long time now.

Have a great Sunday.

September 14, 2019

A post that starts off boring and gets worse from there

I haven't posted much this week. My son was here for a few days and it was great to see him. He arrived safely back in Colorado late yesterday afternoon.

He and one of his roommates left Monday for the drive to Indiana, arriving sometime in the wee hours. We left the  front door unlocked, the alarm off, and our bedroom door open, figuring we would hear him when he came in. Nope, I woke at 5:30 Tuesday morning to find his car parked in front and the doors to the two spare bedrooms closed.

Come on in cat burglars, we will sleep right through it. Sheesh.

Now I know why I have locks, alarms and cameras.

No good news on the job front, in fact it is bad news. The one hot lead has fizzled and there is nothing imminent on the horizon. We are getting by day to day, but the mortgage company won't wait forever. I have tried for factory jobs, but have been rejected as over-qualified. They say I will quit when something better comes along (yes). Part time retail pays less than unemployment and I cannot get full time because then they have to give me benefits -- thanks Obama. I might have to sell cars or insurance, Two things I swore I would never do.

Enough complaining.

Today is my beautiful daughter's xx birthday. We are going to watch the girls while they have a day on the town (after soccer). We are hoping they can sleep over. Other than that, we have no plans.

I tried to post some Friday music yesterday, but the selection wouldn't play. So it goes.

Have a great Saturday.

September 13, 2019

Dem Debate Analysis


Now on to the real stuff: the Democat clown car debates.

Don't care, didn't watch.

That won't keep me from summing the whole thing in a few words:

White people suck
Trump bad
Tax tax tax
Spend spend spend
The Earth is gonna kill us unless we pass universal basic income and drive electric cars
Guns very bad

But white people really really suck

Good luck grabbin' those guns Beto Francis.

September 11, 2019

Eleventh

If you need a reminder that a whole bunch of people hate you, me and everything the United States represents, look no further than this date.

If you actually need that reminder, I'm not sure what to say.

September 10, 2019

The Internet is a sadder place today

It is with great sadness that I learn of tne death of Dustbury -Charles Hill. Another of the great bloggers has left us.

Dustbury was blogging long before many of even heard of the Internet. He was prolific, funny, and talented.

I read him every day.

Rest in peace, Mr. Hill

September 9, 2019

Good Times

I last saw my oldest son almost a year ago at my Mother's funeral. I am almost as giddy as a schoolgirl at a Bieber concert at the notion he will be "home" tomorrow for a few days. All the kids will gather at my house for dinner tomorrow with their families.

It's gonna be a great few days.


September 8, 2019

Bringing back the China Clipper

Here we are on a Sunday morning. This is historically my chatty day here on the old blog. I don't know why I find it easier to write on the Sabbath. It is a mystery. The good news for you is you can click away whenever you want with a TLDR smirk. It is OK, I have no way of knowing.

Well, I do, but it is not worth the effort to see who bothers to wade through my extemporaneous typing. I'm just thankful you bother to stop by.

I did not watch the Democrat's "Here is how we destroy the economy" climate round table on TV the other night. Apparently no one outside of reporters did either. According to news sources, each panalist advocated ridding the country of about 90% of our energy producing capability -- coal, gas, fracking, and nuclear. That leaves wind and solar, both dependant on fickle nature. Boy, that sounds like a great idea. I always wanted to live in the Middle Ages, no pesky electricity to ruin my view of the stars.

All think we should be forced to drive electric cars. Do they understand electric cars need electricity to charge up? Do they realize sometimes people need to drive more than 300 miles and stopping for 8 hours or so to charge up might not be convenient? And how are we supposed to get there when airplanes are banned if we cannot fly? I suppose we will ride the non-existent  trains. Oh wait, they need fuel too.

On a more practical matter, how do these Luddites plan on cultivating fields and transporting goods with only battery power? The same people who decry Trump's Tariffs want to force us to transport our Chinese goods via, I don't know, sailboat I guess? It is time to bring back the venerable China Clipper. What? Sorry, it takes massive amounts of energy to manufacture goods and we will need all we can generate from wind and sun just to power our mandated electric cars. We will have to get our "stuff" from nations  not looking to commit economic suicide.

If you read the real deep accounts of the climate change summit, you will see it is not really about climate, it is about social and economic "justice". In fact, the phrase "climate justice" was bandied about like it was a real thing. I know that "justice" is code for forcibly taking money from one group and giving it to another. Somehow, we are to believe people of color and the poor will be screwed by catastrophic climate change more than white people. Funny, I never thought Mother Nature really cared about our skin color outside of burning white skin if we are out in the sun too long. Should we call sunburn "Black Privilege?

But then I mistakenly learned than skin color is like eye or hair color, just genetics. I must of had a crappy education.

I don't know, it seems to me that if you automatically assume whitey has an advantage and darker colored skin is a disadvantage you are echoing the trope pedaled by the John Calhouns of the antebellum South.

I prefer to think we are born equal and you have to fight and claw to make the most of life.

I'm screwed up like that.

September 7, 2019

A priest and a rabbi...

A Catholic priest and a Rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train.
After a while, the priest opened a conversation by saying “I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork…Have you actually ever tasted it?
The Rabbi said, “I must tell the truth. Yes, I have, on the odd occasion.”
Then the Rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, “Your religion, too…I know you’re supposed to be celibate. But….”
The priest replied, “Yes, I know what you’re going to ask. I have succumbed once or twice.”

There was silence for a while. Then the Rabbi peeped around the newspaper he was reading and said, “Better than pork, isn’t it?”

September 6, 2019

Truth is painful

Progressivism is, at bottom, just organized envy.  If anyone, anywhere, possesses X, then there can never be justice until everyone, everywhere, possesses X.  Rotten Chestnuts


I really have nothing to add.

September 5, 2019

Don’t tell me

A father asks his 10-year-old son if he knows about the birds and the bees.

I don’t want to know! the child says, bursting into tears. Promise me you won’t tell me!

Confused, the father asks what’s wrong.
Oh, dad, the boy sobs. When I was six, I got the There’s no Santa speech. At seven, I got the There’s no Easter Bunny speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the There’s no tooth fairy speech. If you’re going to tell me that adults don’t really have sex, I’ll have nothing left to live for.

September 4, 2019

Continuation of a theme

Not only should the Democrats quit flying around, they should go all in on the proposals they have for us "normals".

I will actually respect the candidate that mantans he/she will limit the use of Air Force One. No more free rides for the media, no more multiple planes for a presidential trip. It is for the environment.

Since guns only incite violence, a Secret Service detail is not needed beyond a couple of unarmed bodyguards to physically ward off would-be bad apples. Thus we don't need an extra plane for all of the vehicles for security. As you say, no one needs the protection of a "military assault weapon". Those guns belong on a battlefield, not a ball field.

Do it for the children.

Ideas, I have them

Maybe if the Democrats are really so concerned about the environment, they should quit flying to Iowa and New Hampshire and driving cars all over the place. Run you campaign from your porch. It worked before.

September 3, 2019

The cleanest back yard in town

Here in suburbia you pay to have your trash hauled away. I throw my garbage, the baby's diapers, and general trash into a big bin with wheels and the company comes and tips the bins into a garbage truck with a big hydraulic arm. If it isn't in the bin, it does not get picked up.

For several weeks I have been slowly disposing of a 25 year old worn and broken patio set. A chair fits into the bin. So each week I toss in a ripped and worn out chair. That fire pit the previous owners left behind? It is gone. That broken umbrella stand? Yep tossed into the bin.

The table was next in line. I was putting it off. It was a long rectangular glass-topped affair that seated six.  The table was still in good shape, but who wants a patio table with two working chairs?That is how many remain that are not ripped or broken. I know the answer. No one wants a chairless table, even on Craigs List for free.

Yesterday I dragged the table from under the pear trees where I had it stashed for the past year or so. Dismantling it should have been easy, and it was, except for the screws I had to drill out, the braces climate welded together, and the general thirty-seven trips to the garage to get yet another tool that isn't right this time either.

I was finally down to one leg/brace combo. I could then remove the glass and bend up the table top frame. I thought I would break up the glass on a tarp and pour it into the bin. As I pulled the last leg out of the frame, the entire top exploded into shards of glass. The biggest pieces were the size of your littlest fingernail, the smallest were, well, smaller than that. Yes, I should have been working on top of the tarp all along.

So there it was, a million shards of glass in the yard exactly in the shape of the table there in the grass.  How do you clean up glass from your lawn? You put on heavy gloves and start picking it up. It took about ten minutes to clean a three inch square.  So, a 6x3 area will take...carry the one...way too long. I grab the shovel and start scooping. I grab the rake and start piling to make scooping easier. Lots of shards have settled down into the grass.

I look around. My yard is secluded. It is blocked on all sides by a 6 foot privacy fence. Trees block the view of both neighbors if they look from 2nd story windows. I grab the old Shop Vac from the garage and suck those little buggers from the yard.

Yes, I vacuumed my back yard. Sure I sucked up some dirt and grass. I probably got some insects too, but I got every tiny bit of glass I could find. Don't tell anybody I vacuumed my lawn. I worked, there is that.

Still, I don't think I will run around barefoot in that part of the yard.

September 2, 2019

Smokin' cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo

I'm late to the old blogeroo on this Labor Day holiday. The wife and I stayed up later than late doing some nekkid wrestling.

I wish

No, but we did stay up later than late catching up on last season's TV shows in time for the next to start. I went to bed at three and woke at 6:30. I turned over and went back to sleep until just short of 9:00. I think I last slept until 9 back in the 1980s.

Some yard work is on tap for today. I may fire up the smoker, but that means a trip to the store, like NOW, to get some appropriate meat. Maybe I'll smoke a cigar instead. Does that count? Ba-dooomp. Thank you very much, don't forget to tip your server.

The Cubs are touting  their 1969 team. Only the Cubs would find a reason to celebrate one of the biggest collapses in sports history. the Miracle Mets only existed because of the Northside choke job. This years' promising squad appears to be headed in the same direction. They spent the weekend scoring exactly as much as I did -- zero, zip, zilch. You can't win games if you do not score runs. Actually hitting the ball would be a good start.

Have a great Labor Day. I think it is nice we honor the pain of child birth. Our Moms are saints. Mine was anyway.

What?

Oh.  Unions?

Screw 'em. How about we call it the "Here comes Fall"  holiday instead?

September 1, 2019

The "Inside Baseball" of Blogging

The cursor keeps blinking an urgent "type something" in electronic morse code. I'm not purposely ignoring the command. There is no malfunction in the keyboard. My fingers are capable of typing. There are just no word signals from my brain to blog.

That is just way things go sometimes.
Consider everything here that is of original content copyrighted as of March 2005