Today is my lovely wife’s birthday she will be ... do you think I’m stupid? Don’t answer that. Do you think I’m so stupid as to spread her age all over the interwebz? We had a moderate steak dinner last night for an early birthday dinner and I’m headed off to grab some donuts after I finish this post. The oldest granddaughter has s dance recital this evening so we needed to celebrate a day early. Watching four year olds dance is like watching goats attempting synchronized swimming. I know from experience it will be semi-organized chaos.
It looks like Trump’s tariff threat to Mexico worked. Mexico claims it will try to reduce the tide of illegals. I was wrong.
Like a lot of stuff Trump does, I don’t like the style but love the results. I agree with the vast majority of the administration’s policies.
It looks like another rainy weekend. It seems to always rain on the wife’s birthday
A lady went into a bar in Texas and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest boots she’d ever seen.
The woman asked the cowboy if it’s true what they say about men with big feet are well endowed. The cowboy grinned and said, “Shore is, little lady. Why don’t you come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to you?”
The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him. The next morning she handed him $200. Blushing, he said, “Well, thankee, ma’am. Ah’m real flattered. Ain’t nobody ever paid me fer mah services before.”
“Don’t be flattered. Take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit.”
Two Seals boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Dallas, headed for Houston. One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat.
Just before take-off, A Green Beret got on and took the aisle seat next to the two Seals. The Green Beret kicked off his boots, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Seal in the window seat said,”I think I’ll get up and get a coke.”
“No problem,” said the Green Beret, “I’ll get it for you.” While he was gone, the Seal picked up the Green Beret’s boot and spit in it.
When the Green Beret returned with the coke, the other Seal said, “That looks good, I think I’ll have one too.”
Again, the Green Beret obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the Seal picked up the other boot and spit in it.
The Green Beret returned and they all sat back and enjoyed the short flight to Houston.
As the plane was landing, the Green Beret slipped his feet into his boots and knew immediately what had happened.
“How long must this go on?” the Green Beret asked. “This fighting between our groups? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in boots and pissing in cokes?”
Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter.
Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.
As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.
Gasping for breath, she replied, “When I see two men from the gas company running, I figure I’d better run too!”
Happy Saturday. It seems to be a fine day, albeit a bit cool. It will rain later. Of course it will.
The kitchen sink has developed a drip. Since the ground floor is open - the family room and kitchen are not separated by walls - I can hear the drip drip drip 💧 every few minutes. It looks like some plumbing is in my very near future. Hooray for me.
In other news, nada. Things are boring. I could complain about stuff but who wants to read that?
To delve just a bit into politics, you do understand that the shipping country doesn’t pay a tariff? These import taxes on Chinese and now Mexican goods are not levied on the producing country. The tariff is paid when the goods enter the States. That means you and I are paying them through higher prices. The one proposed for Mexico will hurt right at the grocery store. Where do you think that early spring produce comes from?
Why do you think the Bostonians heaved that tea off the ships into the harbor? Because the tax was due if it came through customs. That is what customs is — tax collection. Border Control is a different function.
I know I’m in a minority in opposing these tariffs over here on the right. Maybe I should work for an American company and it won’t matter so much? Unfortunately I have spent my life selling parts for vehicles of all sorts, from ag to construction to forklift to big truck to autos and there is not one of those without an international presence. If you think a tariff will result in factories springing up in the heartland in the next few months you are spending too much time down at the local head shop. It doesn’t work that way.
The same politicians want more union jobs will throw so many roadblocks, regulations, and permits to actually build a factory that it takes years to get a new venture up and running. Oh, then the union does everything possible to keep jobs, not keep the employer profitable. Yeah, business exists to make money, not create jobs.
There was a Minister whose wife was expecting a baby. The Minister went to the congregation and asked for a raise. After much consideration and discussion, they passed a rule that when the Minister’s family expanded, so would his pay check.
After five or six children, this started to get expensive. The congregation decided to hold a meeting again to discuss the Minister’s pay situation. You can imagine there was much yelling and bickering. Finally, the Minister got up and spoke to the crowd, “Having children is an act of God!”
In the back of the room, a little old man with a full beard stood up, and in his frail voice said… “Snow and Rain are also ‘acts of God’, but when we get too much, we wear rubbers!”
Yesterday turned out to be a decent day. I took my morning constitutional and read a bit after blogging. I helped the wife clean the house. It rained in the early afternoon. Our friends couldn't make it to play cards though.
We had a little BBQ for dinner and watched a fairly crappy not too funny comedy on Netflix. Ho hum, how the middle class spends a Saturday is boring.
Today? IDK. It is supposed to rain most of the day. Of course they said that about yesterday too. I'll probably read a little. Perhaps I'll pop an old Esther Williams DVD into the blueray if I can't find a suitable old movie on tv. There is an automobile race in the area. I won't go and since it is blacked out, I won't watch it either. I will probably catch part of the Cubbies though.
Ho hum, ho hum. My life is as boring as this blog.
With a Woot and Hooray a long weekend is finally here! It's gonna rain though. The media pointed out we have had rain or snow every single weekend for 14 straight weeks. Yes, that is why my backyard still needs a ton of work. Limbs and leaves still line the fence, weeds are springing up in the flower beds. The patio furniture is dirty and the granddaughter's playhouse is full of leaves and spider webs. The skies are darkening as I hunt and peck one-fingered on my iPad I keyboard. Yes, my backyard is as neglected as this blog.
Sorry 'bout that.
Sinatra is crooning in the background. The coffee is hot. Life is good.
We have no big plans for the weekend. Some friends might come over this evening for a little Euchre and dinner. There will be laughs and the easy relaxation of people who have been friends for more than 40 years.
The weather has been a little chilly for the season but I have hot water. Those cold showers explained why our great grandparents only bathed occasionally. I relived my old camping days as I heated water to wash dishes Sunday.
It is supposed to get warm starting tomorrow, but rain will settle in for the next five or six days. It looks like a damp holiday weekend
In other news, I don’t have any. This blog is holding on with bare life support
I find David Crosby's live version of his tune Triad from the CSN album Four Way Street to be haunting. I rediscovered the Jefferson Airplane version the other day:
While I have never been a devoted fan of the Airplane or Starship, I concede that Grace Slick can sing. She has pipes, baby. Take a listen to White Rabbit if you are too young to remember the psychedelic age. Look it up yourself, a little research is good for the soul.
Without sounding like the "Get off my lawn" old curmudgeon I'm becoming, I maintain they don't make rock music like this any more. They don't make rock music any more. What is left of "old" rock and roll moved to country and is sleeping on the couch, eating Cheetos, smoking dope, and occasionally making an appearance on a track or two of guitar-heavy chart toppers.
Meanwhile old codgers like me cling to the pathetic classic rock stations playing the same 50 songs from 40 or 50 years ago. Really, Elton John sang more than Rocket Man and there are more rock artists than Queen and Aerosmith.
Last night a BMW SUV pulled up next to me blasting bass-heavy rap music.
I got up this morning and shuffled into the bathroom to get ready for work. I grabbed a clean towel from the closet and turned on the sink faucet to shave. The water was cold as usual. It takes a minute or so for the hot water to reach upstairs. The water never got warm, in fact, it got colder.
Damn. Sigh.
I trotted downstairs and out to the garage. I could hear water dripping before I even turned on the light. Yep. The water heater was out. I turned off the water pipe leading to the heater. Crap and double crap.
I called off work then started pricing water heaters.
First, I don't understand the reluctance of a plumber to offer a general estimate. I get things might change once they get to the house, but a price estimate range is not unreasonable. I told three plumbers that if they cannot give me a rough estimate I would work with a plumber who would.
In other news, I am alive, I have a wife who loves me and wonderful grand kids and kids. I am blessed. I do have plenty to be thankful for. A cold shower might be good for me.
I have a few minutes before I head off to the office. A chilly morning will blossom later into a nice spring day. It will be enticingly on display out the floor to ceiling wall of windows just feet from my desk. Even warmer weather, and rain, are expected in the days to come.
I cut the lawn after work last evening. That, coupled with the fact that everything is in bloom outside, means allergies are kicking my butt this morning. The lilac bushes are starting to bloom. The smaller one by the gate is already in full flower. The whiff of lilacs slams you before you even open the gate. The two giant ones by the patio will be in flower by the weekend.
I guess Trump will have to pull an Obama and ship a few hundred million bucks or the Iranians will start misbehaving again. Somehow I don't think this President will play that old game. Somehow I also don't think he will be like Obama and apologize to the Mullahs if they attack one of our ships.
It is a chilly Monday here at the homestead. We went to my daughter's for a Mothers Day cookout. They provided the burgers, I made potato and pasta salads, deviled eggs, and a homemade peanut butter pie.
It rained all weekend. You can almost see the grass and weeds growing. The spring ants are doing their best to move into the dry house. I am fighting them off, streams of bug spray are mowing them down by the patio doors like fire from that GoT dragon.
Speaking of GoT, I'm not sure how blasts of flame makes stone walls explode, but it was cool. I'm not sure how the Packers will survive without Mr Rogers, though.
At about 11:30 this morning my daughter gave birth to a healthy beautiful baby girl. Everyone is doing fine. The big sister is bursting with pride and excitement.
